Finding Gavin (Southern Boys #2) Read Online Free PDF

stop them. Randall took me into his arms and pulled me against his chest. I cried into his shirt, gripping it tightly in my fisted hands.
    The boys had told Momma and me on the way that they had brought hospice in a couple of days ago. I knew things were bad, but I was still finding it hard to see him face to face. I wasn’t sure now that I could follow through with it.
    “I don’t know if I can go in there,” I said against Randall’s chest.
    “You can.” He pushed back and forced me to look up at him. His eyes held a warmth in them that seemed to calm me. “You’re a Thompson,” he winked. “You got this, Maria. I know you can do it.”
    I was not close to my oldest brother, not in the least, but I couldn’t have done this without his push. I took in a deep breath as he nudged me through the doorway.
    I slowly scanned the house and its contents. Everything looked so old and worn out. The furniture had to have been as old as I am. Torn and faded. The hardwood floor and walls held the same aged look as the exterior.
    Standing in silence, my chest constricted when I heard a raspy whisper. “Maria.”
    Squeezing my eyes tightly, I gave myself a mental pep talk before turning to face the man who I had spent my entire life hating. The frail man lying in a hospital bed in the center of the bedroom, just off the living room, was not the man I had pictured. He had sunken eyes and dark spots covering his skin, and it was shattering to find him in this form.
    He motioned with his hand for me to come closer, and I swallowed past the emotions. I took a step into the room and found my brother Billy sitting at the foot of my father’s bed. He was holding in his arms a young boy who I immediately pinned to be his son, because they were so similar. It was so strange to discover I had a nephew I didn’t even know existed. I forced a smile, and he nodded his head.
    “You look just like your momma,” my father whispered, causing me to turn my gaze back to meet his. His eyes appeared glossy and saddened. “Such a beautiful girl.”
    I couldn’t speak, because my throat felt like it was on fire. I stared back at him, mirroring his sadness. For so many different reasons, I felt lost. I had been cheated out of life with him, and now I had to choke back all the hate I had for him. I had to hold in all the harsh words I wanted to scream at him. I had to make peace while there was still a chance.
    Billy stood from his chair and pushed it to the side of the bed. “We’re going to step out, let you two talk,” he said. I could only nod my head. He closed the door behind him, and I immediately felt panic seep into my chest.
    “Take a seat, girl. I think I have things to say you may want to hear.” His voice was so weak, as if it pained him to speak. I listened as I sat down and worried my lower lip, trying to hide the fact that it was trembling.
    After a few silent, uncomfortable moments he spoke. “You and your momma did nothing to make me leave. That was on all on me. I got in some gambling trouble and began drinking heavy. When you were born, I’ll admit it drove me further away.” I looked up at him. “Not for the reasons you’re thinking. I knew that I was in over my head. I was on the verge of losing everything, and I didn’t want to take your momma down with me. With another child to feed, I lost it. I ran and I lost it. I drowned myself out for years. I ran from my problems and hid them well from your brothers.”
    He took a deep breath and shook his head. “I’m a selfish bastard. I used your brothers to make me money so I could feed my addictions. In the end, I’ll lose it all anyway. I spent years making the boys feel guilty, like they caused it somehow. It’s all on me, Maria, and it took being on my death bed for me to own up to it.” A tear escaped and ran over his cheek, dripping onto the pillow beneath him. “You deserved better than the man I was.”
    “Deserved better? Are you saying that