Fearsome Dreamer Read Online Free PDF Page B

thing. Or you’d forget everything except the one thing you wanted to, and it would grow in the space you’d created, consuming you completely.
    The alternatives were also bad. Give the woman something to make her reckless, maybe reckless enough to leave her husband … or reckless enough to run away. Kill herself. Do wild and silly things. Who knew? It depended on the person in the end. Didn’t it always? Or give the husband something that would make him sick every time he touched his wife. But that way lay bad power. Bad power always came back to you.
    â€˜Who is it?’ she said at last.
    Til sighed and shifted. ‘Why do you need to know?’
    â€˜I can’t help you without knowing everything.’
    He looked at her for a long moment. Her belly rolled again. She allowed a small hope to bloom. It was stupid, she knew it.
    He said a name, and her hope was squashed. Her reaction must have been too strong, because he sat back from her, looking wary.
    â€˜That …’ She forced the explosion down, away. Took a breath. ‘She’s got men on a string. She knows how to play ’em. I’ve heard some wild stories. You must know this about her. All the girls know this about her!’
    Til looked away, his expression dark. She knew she wouldn’t change his mind. The lines across his face told her that.
    The silence grew heavier. Rue fumbled with the right words. She wanted to help him. Helping him would forge the connection she craved. But she wanted to help him forget the woman who had a grip on his heart. No good lay that way. No good at all. Rue wanted Til for herself, but she also wanted to be unselfish, the way she should be, and with this battle raging she plunged ahead.
    â€˜Is there really no one else for you?’ she said. ‘Perhaps this’ll pass.’
    â€˜Not these twenty years,’ he replied, far away. ‘And so I don’t expect t’will ever leave me be.’
    Rue felt smaller at his words. In comparison, her desire for Til was a passing moment, a flicker at best. How could she compete with this strength of passion? She had not even been alive for as long as Til had loved this woman.
    â€˜I can suggest nothing that ain’t … uncertain,’ she said at last. ‘The best thing would be to speak to her.’
    â€˜No,’ said Til. ‘No. It won’t do. I can’t even look at her without her man giving me an eye. He won’t let her from her leash long enough to speak to her alone. And if I stopped her in the street … people would talk.’
    Rue understood that. He had been very careful so far – she’d never heard of a gossipful concerning him and the lady in question. Being careful was getting him nowhere.
    He turned and shone his gaze on her like a lamp in her eyes.
    â€˜I’ve an idea,’ she said, to break the stare. ‘There’s something you could give her. It’s unpredictable, but in small bits it might help. And with the right timing and all.’
    The bruised look left his face and it filled with hope. Rue gazed at her glass.
    â€˜It’s most powerful as a tea,’ she said. ‘But wild. If you had it in a powder, and found a way for her to use the powder just a bit, every day. Then maybe that would work better.’
    His brow wrinkled. ‘Like how?’
    â€˜Put it in something only she would wear. Her creams, or make-up. Something.’
    He was already shaking his head. ‘How would I even get close enough?’
    â€˜Give her a present,’ said Rue impatiently. Did men have no cunning at all? ‘Give it through one of her woman friends who can be trusted. Or give it anonymously. It don’t have to be obviously from you, though t’would be better if at least she knew it were.’
    â€˜Why?’
    â€˜Cos if she uses it, you know she likes you,’ said Rue.
    She watched him contemplate this.
    â€˜What will it do?’ he