Faithful Read Online Free PDF Page A

seemed drunk with stupor. Through the open windows of Mary’s grand mansion I heard the sea, the huge foaming breakers that crashed in the still air, overwhelming the delicate efforts of the small orchestra. Lightning flickered on the far horizon, echoing the tiny lights strung from branch to branch in the gardens outside. In the small parlor where the women gathered to primp, I found Kitty, and we admired one another’s dress. She was done up in blue silk that spilled in ten yards of rustling train. Her hair glittered with diamonds that matched her necklace. My black-and-white gown was daring in the company of the other girls’ sweeping pastels.
    Black and white with a bloodred sash. I’d wanted something bold and romantic. I hadn’t thought about the other implications.
    “Well, it’s not truly bohemian,” Kitty said, twisting me around, and that word hit me like a shock of cold water. “Not really. Although . . .” She paused as she ran her fingers along the red sash. Her voice dropped to a hush. “That’s a bit dangerous.”
    “Radical,” said Isabel with a sniff. “I think it’s over-the-top.”
    Isabel moved away. I narrowed my eyes and flashed open my red oriental fan, feeling both nervous and annoyed. Had I pushed it too far with this daring dress? But Kitty leaned in close. “Isabel’s miserable,” she whispered. “She’s had a thing for Edward and he no longer gives her the time of day.”
    My heart took a little jump and my nervousness vanished.
    “In fact, I think I saw him arrive,” Kitty said. “Shall we go in?”
    Mina returned to my room with tissue paper and I dropped the sash, sighing as the memory of that evening heaved and swelled like the sea. Mina folded the offending gown in the paper and removed it from my room. Maybe Mina was right. That dress with its dripping sash may have been cursed, one of my only rebellions paid for in blood.
    I looked at the other gowns and day dresses that lay piled on my bed waiting for my selection. From deep within I saw a glimpse of seafoam green. I tugged it out from under the rest and laid it on top of the pile. That one I would take west. That gown conjured a sweet memory of the time when Mama was still keeping the promise she’d made to me. I picked up the gown and pressed it to my cheek, feeling the cool silk. I would take this gown west and carry a charm that would bring back Mama as she was that day last July, when we’d chosen it for me together.
    Madame Bouchard could tailor the latest French fashions. It was a late July day, not too warm, soft and breezy. Mama and I had huddled side by side over the great table in Madame Bouchard’s shop, choosing fabrics and examining patterns. Sometimes Mama seemed to forget the task at hand, but I gently tugged her back to the moment with a careful word or a touch of my hand. We’d chosen three light-wool street costumes and two tea gowns when the small bell rang merrily and the door opened behind us.
    Kitty swept in. I gazed at her, jealous of her beige silk gown and jacket; her waist was rapier thin. Her sleeves belled fashionably and her hat dipped to the right, dripping silk tuberoses. Her eyes, as they took in Mama’s staid outfit, dripped curiosity.
    “You look wonderfully healthy, Mrs. Bennet.” Kitty smiled, soft ringlets framing her angelic face. “Have you put on some weight?”
    Mama blushed and spoke carefully. “Maggie and I have returned to evening exercise together. Along the Cliff Walk.”
    “Maggie on the Cliff Walk?” Kitty’s eyebrows arched in surprise.
    “Mama takes the outside when it’s steep. I try not to look.” The path was terrifyingly steep in places, and merely a glance at the sheer drop could paralyze me.
    “How sweet!” Kitty giggled, and leaned toward Mama. “Why, a few weeks ago Mags couldn’t even climb the ladder to help our teacher pin up the confetti streamers for our last-day party!”
    I blushed, but it was true. I only walked with Mama because I