Everything is Changed Read Online Free PDF Page B

you are.’
    Am I?
    â€˜Jake, we can’t hang out together if we end up in jail. It’s just the end of everything. That would suck. I don’t want that to happen. It would kill your mum. My folks wouldn’t care much. But your mum would. Especially because of your dad. Imagine how she’d feel. She’d blame herself.’
    â€˜I know, but …’
    â€˜We can’t change anything. We can’t bring him back. And it would just hurt more people.’
    â€˜Yeah. I guess,’ I say.
    Alex’s arm feels super heavy on my shoulders.
    â€˜I think we just need to hang out more,’ he says.
    â€˜Yeah? Really?’
    â€˜Yeah. I miss you.’
    â€˜Me too,’ I say, the emotion flooding through me.
    â€˜Good. What about this weekend? You busy?’
    â€˜What about now?’
    He laughs and the sound is awesome.
    â€˜Can’t. Got to go deal with him,’ he says, nodding towards the house.
    â€˜Oh yeah. Right,’ I say, liking how he doesn’t seem to care about his new friend. ‘The weekend, then? Yeah, it’s your birthday. Let’s hang out on your birthday. Just you and me,’ I say, turning to see his face, the shadows under his eyes, the dark glaze that was never there before.
    He smiles and nods and I wish we were back at school messing around in one of our classes and hanging out for the skate park after dark.
    â€˜Not sure I can on my birthday,’ he says quietly.
    And the anger rushes through me like I’m being electrocuted.
    â€˜You have to,’ I say with steel in my voice.
    He looks surprised and then nods. ‘Okay.’
    â€˜Promise?’ I need to lock him in. I need to know we’re in this together.
    â€˜Promise. I’ll call you, Jake,’ he says, releasing my shoulder and stepping away. ‘I’d better go. We good?’
    â€˜Yeah.’
    He waves at me as he walks down the path to his house. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Alex wave before. It’s the strangest sight. I’m not sure what it means either, but it seems very final, like he’s dismissing me, happy now we’ve sorted everything out. I want to believe that he misses me. I want to believe that we can go back to what we were. Because back then I didn’t feel like this. Back then I felt hopeful and in control. But Alex isn’t right about me. I’m not like my dad. My dad would never have considered handing himself in.

alex
    I’ve heard she’s here. Of all the places for her to be she’s at this party that I didn’t even want to come to, but was dragged to by Tone and Murphy. I was going to leave, but now I want to see her, I want to meet her. Properly, not like at the debate. I don’t really remember what she looks like. Other than her long, red hair. And there are so many people here. There must be at least a hundred, maybe more. And apparently there are no adults. Just teenagers. Half my year is here and the rest are from other private schools around. I keep seeing familiar faces but I don’t know many people so I can sneak through the crowd looking for her.
    It’s a big house with a huge backyard, so there are bodies everywhere. Music is blaring somewhere inside, but outside it’s just shadows and tiny corners of light. There are trees lining the fence to stop anyone looking in, and down the back there’s a tennis court that kids are mucking around on. There’s a lot of yelling and laughing, and a circle of girls are dancing barefoot on the grass.
    â€˜Zander!’ I hear a slurring voice yell out that stupid nickname and I know it’s Tone. Nobody else calls me that. I spin around trying to find him, just as a knee digs into my back. Tone leaps onto me and tries to drag me down. I manage to shrug him off and let him fall to the ground. He laughs as he crashes onto the grass, then staggers to his feet. His shirt’s half stuffed into his pants at the