Everybody Pays Read Online Free PDF Page B

could get food for myself.
    Everything changed when I got to be thirteen. I got bigger. Not as big as some of the kids, but not the smallest, not even close.
    The next year, I’m not sure why, girls got very important. Different boys did different things to have girlfriends. I really couldn’t do anything. I wasn’t good at basketball, I couldn’t dance, and I didn’t really like to fight. And, of course, I never had money to get very nice clothes or buy girls presents.
    That’s when I got the idea about stealing. I read everything I could about it. I studied it. Then I started. I only took money. Cash money. Never anything else. Sometimes, I would go in a house at night and there would be no money. That was okay. I knew that would happen. It would happen if someone were to break into my mother’s house, too, I guess.
    I never spent the money. I mean, I never spent a lot. So nobody noticed. But I always had a little. I mean, enough. I bought some nicer clothes. But I still had plenty of money left. And I thought all the time about being stronger. My mother didn’t hit me or hurt me anymore, but, sometimes, one of the men she had would if she asked him to. So I spent most of the money I had on stuff to make me stronger.
    I don’t know how it happened with Darla. She was in my class and all. I had known her for years. Not really
known
her, but . . . well, it’s a small school and I guess I knew just about everyone. I never went up to any of the girls. But Darla asked me a question once. In the library. And I talked to her. After a while, she said she was real thirsty, so I asked her could I buy her a soda and she said yes.
    After that, it just . . . happened. I don’t know how. But it was the best thing in the world. Darla was my girlfriend. Not my secret girlfriend either. Everybody knew. I bought her a lot of nice stuff. Once she told me I shouldn’t do that. Her parents were worried, she said. She was just fourteen, and she shouldn’t be getting such expensive stuff. It was just a CD player, but I guess it made them nervous. So I stopped. I met them and everything. Once they met me, they liked me. I told them I got the money for the CD player by mowing lawns and washing cars and other stuff I knew kids did. I told them I had saved up. They said that was fine, but I shouldn’t spend so much money on a girl at my age. I said all right, and they smiled.
    I bought Darla an ID bracelet. Sterling silver. She could only keep it at school, because her parents would get upset, but that was okay. She always wore it at school, and everyone knew it was mine.
    A couple of times, her parents said I was maybe spending too much time with Darla. Calling her too much. I guess maybe they were right. But I wanted to be with her all the time. I said they were right, though, and they felt better. I could tell.
    Darla and I were going to be married someday anyway, and then I’d be with her all the time.
    I don’t know who did it. I don’t know who to blame. Maybe it was the guidance counselor. I saw my file, the one she kept. I wasn’t that curious, but I had already broken into the school. Lots of teachers leave money in their desks. In my file, it said: Attachment Disorder. And the words “unhealthy relationship” a lot. About me and Darla. So maybe it
was
the guidance counselor. Or it could have been Darla’s parents. But I know that it wasn’t what
she
said—that she just wanted to have dates and stuff with other boys and maybe we were too close and she was too young to make a commitment. I know Darla would never have said anything like that unless someone had told her to do it.
    I didn’t say anything. I didn’t go back to school the next day. I had to think things over.
    It’s Friday now. The last Friday of the month. That’s Dress-Up Day at school. Girls can wear makeup and high heels and boys can wear suits and all. Some of the boys don’t do it, but all the girls do. I knew Darla would be all dressed up, but