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hover in the air between us.
     
    Trav blinks,
    Frowns.
    “I, yeah, I guess I like flowers.”
    He follows a tear down my cheek with his thumb.
    “But you knew that, Elly.
    I brought you flowers a bunch of times last summer.”
     
    “But I never thought it was because you liked them. I thought—”
    I pause, not really sure what Trav’s flowers meant to me.
    I guess I just thought that’s what boys did when they liked a girl.
    Because girls like flowers,
    Not the other way around.
     
    “I liked the way they made you smile at me with that edge in your eyes.”
     
    “Edge?” I ask.
     
    “The one that said, ‘Thank you, love you, can’t wait to kiss you.’”
    Travis settles back onto the floor next to me,
    Not touching,
    But close enough to kiss.

TRAV SLOWLY SLIDES HIS FINGERS BETWEEN MINE.
    “I’m sorry,” he says,
    Real soft,
    Like he’s afraid loud noises and sudden movements will startle me.
    “I made a lot of mistakes with you,
    A lot.”
     
    With his free hand,
    He gently turns my face until we’re eye to eye.
    “But Elly, I don’t regret it.
    I wish it had happened differently,
    But I’m still glad it happened.”
     
    “Everything?” I ask.
    “You’re glad everything happened?”
     
    He gazes at me steadily.
    “Every single thing.
    I am so in love with you,
    And if you’ll let me,
    I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to—”
     
    “Prove it,” we say together.

“I’M GOING TO FLORIDA,” JESSE SAID LAST AUGUST,
    Flopped onto the couch,
    Flipped through the gaming menu on the Xbox.
     
    “Florida?” I asked,
    My voice too squeaky.
    Trav wasn’t there;
    Him mom had taken him for a bonding moment.
     
    “A trip for ice cream can’t buy me,” he’d muttered just before leaving.
    But he’d gone,
    Just like he’d gone to the mall with her to buy jeans,
    Just like they’d gone to the baseball game last week.
     
    Jesse claimed she was trying,
    She’d gone to work every day for weeks,
    She’d paid the rent, the utilities,
    She’d questioned Trav about his upcoming senior year.
     
    Gaming with only Jesse had become natural,
    Easy,
    The way it was with Trav,
    But without the possibility of kissing.
     
    “I don’t want you to go to Florida,” I said.
     
    “I need to get out of here,” he said.
    “It’s not healthy.”
     
    I frowned,
    Put my controller down so I could study him,
    Asked, “Baseball?”
     
    “Baseball,” he said,
    Looking at me,
    Somehow saying more than that one word.
     
    I wasn’t sure what he meant,
    But my heart heard,
    I need to get out of here,
    Spoken in my own voice.
     
    “Your mom?” I asked,
    “When’s she out of rehab?”
     
    “Just after Labor Day,” he said,
    “That’s why I have to go soon.
    I have to get out of here before
    She has a chance to drag me down again.”
     
    I thought of Travis,
    The way he snapped to attention when his mother came around,
    The way he disappeared inside himself when she left.
    I wanted to talk to Jesse,
    Ask him if he acted the same with his mom.
     
    I didn’t.
     
    “Let’s game,” he said,
    Picked up his controller again.
     
    I punched buttons,
    Thought about what he’d said.
    I need to get out of here.
     
    At least he had somewhere to go,
    A destination with promise,
    An activity he loved.
     
    As Jesse’s departure grew closer and closer,
    I tried to find something for myself,
    Something besides Travis.
     
    I hadn’t been able to,
    And when Jesse showed up on the roof that last night,
    Alone,
    Distraught,
    He’d said, “Tell me straight.
    Tell me he’s worth it.”
     
    I knew he meant Travis,
    But I didn’t know what he had to do with
    Jesse leaving.
     
    “Is that why you’re leaving?” I asked.
     
    “I’m leaving because there’s nothing for me here.”
    Jesse filled the space next to me,
    Radiated friendship,
    Safety,
    Fear.
    “And I don’t think there’s anything here for you either.”
     
    “Travis—”
     
    “Will never leave Chicago,” Jesse