Dust to Dust: A Broken Fairy Tale Read Online Free PDF Page A

brought out to the cans on the side of the house. Thanks, Dad, I think sarcastically. I slip on my dad’s heavy down jacket and boots before heading out to the trash cans outside. I grab the bag, trying to flip it up onto my shoulder like Santa Claus, but the weight of the trash bag almost sends me tumbling over, down the iced-over steps. I regain my footing and turn around, hopping it down the steps to the walkway. The cold air slices through me like a knife when I step onto the porch at the side of my house. It has to be below zero tonight with the wind chill but the cold is a welcomed shock to my numbed system. Tears that were once on my cheeks are swept away with the brutal breeze assaulting my face. I don’t care about the cold. I just need to be away from Marcus, to be away from everyone, so that I can do anything but think about the possibility of causing my marriage to crumble apart.
    I begin digging into my dad’s jacket pocket, and quickly find what I knew was hidden there. I pull out an almost empty pack of Marlboro Reds. Really, Dad? Without hesitation, I take out a cigarette, trying to flip it up into my mouth like I used to do when I was in college. Unsuccessful at my attempt, I watch as it bounces off my nose and onto my boot. I have to laugh a little at my confident attempt trying something I haven’t tried in years. Learning from my stupidity, I place the cigarette into my mouth this time, taking a deep drag, trying to warm my insides. At first the suffocating sensation of the smoke filling my lungs sends a calm through me. Then the reality that I haven’t smoked in years hits my body, and I begin hacking up a lung. As I’m caught between trying to catch my breath and laughing at myself for another stupid move, the bright headlights of a car slowly turning down the deserted icy street catches my attention. It’s very unusual for a car to drive down our street this time of year, especially this late at night. I can’t help but wonder if it is the Hawker family back from their day in the city. I always loved hearing the stories of their highly dysfunctional family events. It always makes me feel more normal knowing there are people even crazier than me out there.
    I take a couple deep breaths and try to clear my throat as my curiosity gets the best of me and I head out towards the street. I need a little neighborly conversation to distract me from the reality of my life, so I continue out to the end of the wooden fence next to the driveway where the trashcans are lined up, dragging the heavy bag of trash behind me so that I can appear to be doing something other than being nosey. My mind seems to freeze as the dark car approaches my house. No one else lives at this end of the street this time of year. It can’t be.
    Suddenly snow begins to fall in sheets seemingly coming from nowhere, making the car slow down almost to a stop in front of me. I nervously wrap my dad’s enormous winter coat around me when the mysterious car suddenly pulls in next door, into Holden’s old driveway. It can’t be.
    It’s a black Tahoe with blacked-out windows, a newer version of one like Holden used to drive. My heart skips a beat for a second, hoping it really is Holden, but I know it can’t be. Then reality sets in. Holden hasn’t lived here since his parents died eight years ago. There has been a new owner every summer since he hastily sold it to the first person who made an offer. No one who bought his family’s house stayed year round like Holden’s used to.
    I stand motionless for a moment before wiping the snowflakes from my now numb face, and silently curse myself for standing out here in a blizzard being a nosey neighbor for so long. What was I thinking? Even if it had been the Hawkers, I wouldn’t have gone over to them this time of night. Especially with a tear-streaked face and cigarette smoke on my breath. Holden is gone and is never coming back .
    My eyes are now watering from the cold and my nose is