Deep Blue Secret Read Online Free PDF

lifted, I felt some degree of comfort from the familiar items. My lungs filled with the scent of home and I slunk back to my room, letting my bag slide through my fingers to the floor near the door.
    Logically it was a bad idea, but I wanted to wallow in the pain.
    I selected a CD from my music collection that contained a mix of instrumental pieces. It was mostly new age piano selections, some accompanied by orchestras, and a few songs from movie scores. This probably wasn’t the typical music choice by the average teenager. I doubted any kids from my school had even heard these songs before, but to me they were beautiful and full of passion; which normally I found uplifting, but not today.
    I knew it was likely to increase the negative emotions, but I couldn’t restrain myself. I put the CD in the player and rolled on my bed like a boulder. My shoulders slumped against the mound of pillows in front of the sand-colored head board.
    The forlorn notes of Cristofori’s Dream replaced the eerie silence, sending a chill up my neck.
    The piano sang in desperation. Lamenting strings pierced the air as if grieving on my behalf. The notes edged through my mind and I stared across the room, right through the beige wall to the void beyond.
    My eyes labored through nothingness, searching for the tiniest fragment of hope to no avail. There was no finding what left me incomplete. As my soul reached the depths of despair I broke down and tears trickled down my cheeks.
    I didn’t understand why I felt this way, but I couldn’t find relief. I curled myself in a ball and hugged one of the pillows, stricken with abandonment. My faint sobs turned to weeping. I clung to the pillow more fervently, crying out as my soul writhed in pain.
    Eternity crept slowly by while I languished away on my pillow, the damp fabric clinging to my cheek. The energy drained from my body, weary and fatigued from the emotional outpouring.
    The CD must have come to completion; only silence filled the air. Everything felt numb all over. My gaze barely limped across the room with nowhere to go.
    That was enough. As much as it hurt, I couldn’t just lie here and rot away in agony.  I couldn’t let myself. I needed to be surrounded with something pleasant enough to push out the pain. I needed to go to the ocean.
    I could only hope it would work. If there was anything out there that would help clear my head it was my favorite place in the world…Crystal Cove.
    I forced myself out to my car and started the engine.
    Despite my melancholy, I decided to try some upbeat music, hoping for any extra lift I could get. I selected a play-list that was a collection of billboard hits, mostly songs airing on the radio over the last year. It didn’t have any mushy songs, only happy, energetic ones that could get your feet tapping.
    Even though it was out of my way, I turned to meet up with Superior Avenue. It was my favorite street. As my car rolled around the bend I took in the beautiful seascape across my windshield. It was worth adding a few minutes to my drive to gaze at the ocean and feel the immensity. Rolling down the hill lined with palm trees felt almost like coming home.
    Normally I cruised along Coast Highway with the windows cracked and the volume turned up, but I just couldn’t feel the sunshine. It was no use. The music didn’t help. I ripped the earphones from my head and tossed the player in the passenger seat. I would have to wait and hope the beach would be enough to make a difference.
    I’d been to Crystal Cove so many times now, I couldn’t keep track. I’d spent many pleasant summer days there with my mom growing up, and lately I’d go when I wanted to be alone, without the distraction of friends. It wasn't a place high school kids normally hung out. They were usually found down by Huntington Pier or the River Jetties, where people go to watch the surfers. They're fun places when you're in a social mood, but today I needed to feel close to