have a cent. I donât know what to do. Iâm not stealing.â
He broke into a run, heading for the highway, but slowed to a walk after a few meters. Where would he go? He was still holding the revolver. He put it back in the holster, which was attached to his belt and concealed by his shirt. There were no cars in sight, and the lights of Tingo MarÃa seemed very far away.
âBelieve it or not, Corporal, I felt calm, relieved,â said the boy. âLike when you wake up and realize the nightmare was only a nightmare.â
âBut why are you keeping the best part to yourself, Tomasito?â Lituma laughed again.
Along with the sounds of the insects and the woods, the boy heard the womanâs hurried steps trying to catch up with him. He felt her beside him.
âBut Iâm not hiding anything, Corporal. Thatâs the whole truth. Thatâs exactly how it happened.â
âHe didnât let me take a cent,â she complained. âThat fat shit. I wasnât stealing, just borrowing enough to get to Lima. I donât have a cent. I donât know what Iâm going to do.â
âI donât know what Iâm going to do either,â said Tomás.
They stumbled on the winding little path covered with dead leaves, slipped in the ruts made by the rain, felt the brush of leaves and spiderwebs on their faces and arms.
âWho told you to butt in?â The woman immediately lowered her voice, as if regretting her remark. But a moment later she went on berating him, although in a more restrained way. âWho made you my bodyguard, who asked you to protect me? Did I? You fucked up and you fucked me up too, and I didnât even do anything.â
âFrom what youâre telling me, you were already hot for her that night,â Lituma declared. âYou didnât pull out your revolver and shoot him because the stuff he was doing made you sick. Admit that you were jealous. You didnât tell me the most important part, Tomasito.â
2
âAll those deaths just slide right off the mountain people,â Lituma thought. The night before, in Dionisioâs cantina, he had heard the news of the attack on the Andahuaylas bus, and not one of the laborers who were eating and drinking there had a single thing to say. âIâll never figure out what the fuckâs going on here,â he thought. Those three missing men hadnât run away from their families, and they hadnât stolen any machinery from camp. They had gone to join the terruco militia. Or the terrucos had murdered them and buried the bodies in some hollow in the hills. But if the Senderistas were already here and had accomplices among the laborers, why hadnât they attacked the post yet? Why hadnât they put him and Tomasito on trial? Maybe they were just sadists who wanted to break their nerve before they blew them to bits with dynamite. They wouldnât even have time to pull their revolvers from under their pillows, let alone get the rifles out of the wardrobe. They would sneak up and surround the shack while they slept the nightmare-ridden sleep they had every night, or while Tomás was recalling his love affair and using Litumaâs shoulder to cry on. A deafening noise, the flash of powder, night turned into day: theyâd blow off their hands and legs and heads all at the same time. Drawn and quartered like Tupac Amarú, compadre. It could happen any time, maybe tonight. And in Dionisio and the witchâs cantina, the serruchos would put on the same innocent faces they put on last night when they heard about the Andahuaylas bus.
He sighed and loosened his kepi. This was the time of day when the mute used to wash their clothes, there, a few meters away, just like the Indian women: beating each article against a rock and wringing it out carefully in the washtub. He worked very conscientiously, soaping shirts and underwear over and over again. Then he would