but Jonesyâs paying attention now.
âThey should try Stillwell,â Jonesy says.
I look over at Zach, who nods.
Jonesy clicks off the TV. âThe defense has to dominate. Youâve got to be monsters. The offense will be okay, but the defense can win games.â Heâs still thinking about the team. Itâs part of what makes him such a good quarterback.
âTyson feels bad,â Zach says.
âHe should have eased up.â I open a Twinkie and hand it to Jonesy.
âThatâs Tyson,â Jonesy says. âHe was rushing. Coach was yelling. Maybe he didnât know it was me.â He takes a bite of the Twinkie.
âHeâs played with you for two years,â I say. âHe should know.â
âDonât blame Tyson,â Zach says. âWeâve got to stick together.â
Sometimes I wish Zach didnât sound so much like acoach. I wish heâd think for himself more. I hand Jonesy another Twinkie. âYouâve still got senior year. Youâre still the Superstar.â
âThatâs right. Itâs not like Iâm dead.â Jonesy shoves the Twinkie into his mouth.
At home, I stare out my bedroom window. I donât like seeing Jonesy in that sling.
âMiles.â Mom knocks.
âYeah.â
She hurries in and shuts the door. âI found these in your pocket when I was doing laundry.â She holds the gold capsules. âWhat are they?â
âNothing.â I cross my arms.
âWhat?â She looks worried.
âSomething one of the guys gave me. Itâs nothing.â How stupid to leave them in my pocket.
âWhat are they?â She shuts off my CD player.
âI didnât take them.â
âWhy are they here?â Mom paces back and forth.
âBecause I didnât take them. Thatâs why theyâre in my pocket.â
Momâs eyes narrow with the look she gets when sheâs angry. âIâm asking you once more what these are,â she says. âIf you donât tell me, Iâll call your father.â
Thatâs one thing I donât need. âTheyâre called Rip Blast.â
âWhatâs that?â
âJust caffeine. Something guys take to get psyched up.â
âWho gave them to you?â
âZach.â
âIs he taking them?â She looks closely at the pills, as if sheâs expecting them to talk.
âYeah. Itâs nothing.â
âDonât mess with these, Miles.â She runs her hand through her hair. âI read an article in
People
about a high school football player who committed suicide after taking steroids. It devastated his family.â
âThese arenât steroids, Mom.â Sometimes sheâs so extreme.
âI donât want you taking anything. Donât risk your future for a football game.â
âOkay, Mom.â
âStay away from them. Do you understand?â
âYes, Mom.â
âDo you promise?â
âYes, Mom.â
She stands at the door as if she wants to say more.
âYouâre not telling Dad, are you?â
âI donât know. Do you think I need to?â She rubs her lower lip.
âNo.â
âIâll see.â Mom closes the door.
I hear the toilet flush and imagine the capsules swirling down.
Iâm not sure how Dad would react. He wants me to be a better football player, but he doesnât like drugs. This isnât really a drug, though. Itâs a stimulant, a performance enhancer. But Dad doesnât like shortcuts either.
chapter nine
âJonesy has a separated shoulder and is out for the season.â I get right to the news at dinner.
âWhat?â Dad asks. âHowâd Sepolski get his quarterback hurt in practice?â
âHe didnât know it was Jonesy.â
âHow could he not know?â
âHe thought it was Fox.â
âHe canât keep his quarterbacks straight. Maybe