Cotter's England Read Online Free PDF

firedogs; high on the mantelshelf were bundles of lighters made by him and in the oven a few newspapers to dry. Uncle Simon made, tended, mended and raked out the house fires.
    It was about nine thirty at night. Simon heard a sound, got up, a bowed and cramped little man, with his spectacles on, half-opened the hall door and sat down again, looking towards the door. Someone came in by the front door. Simon shrugged slightly. Mr. Thomas Cotter, Senior, hung up his hat and coat on the hall stand and said, "Well, well, well, well, well," in a fine loud baritone. There was no answer. He came down the hall to the kitchen door. "Where's Mrs. Cotter?" said he.
    Simon looked him up and down, a long look for Thomas was just on six feet tall, and very broad; and then he said, "She's been in bed all day and she's asleep now or ought to be, if ye didn't wake her." He went back to the Daily Mail.
    Mr. Cotter, in the door, turned cheerfully to call, "Are you there, Peggy? Where's Peggy?" He turned back, came in saying, "And me, a hungry man." Simon looked at the hall door. Cotter came in, pulling it to, and looked down at the fire. "Good evening," said Mr. Cotter.
    "Good evenin'," said Simon; "your dinner's in the oven. It'll be warm."
    Cotter said, in a jolly tone, "Must I get it myself with women in the house?"
    Simon said, reading his paper, "It's been waitin' for ye."
    Mr. Cotter sat down and at this moment the dog Tom came through the hall door and after growling a little at Cotter and a little at Uncle Simon, but only for the form, he looked in his various saucers, drank some water and came to the fire. Cotter said to the dog, "There's a bad dog, there never was a worse dog than that. Like dog, like master. If they'd given you to me, Tom, you'd be a different dog tonight." The kelpie turned round and barked at Mr. Cotter.
    Quickly Peggy came in scolding, "What are ye doin' to him, man?"
    "Well," said Cotter, "it's the gaffer! I'm hungry, gaffer. She's the gaffer now and we all have to watch our P's and Q's. Where's my dinner, lass? Do you mean to say a man comes in late and nothing waiting for him, eh?"
    "You could have come before, we all ate hours ago."
    "And a house with women in it and I must serve myself, is that it," said Cotter tenderly, looking round.
    "If it's the women's food you're eating as well as your own, I don't see why not," said Peggy, at the same time getting plates out of the oven. "Will you eat here tonight?"
    "Thomas Cotter eats in his own dining room," said he graciously; "and I hope you haven't let the fire go out; don't say you haven't laid the cloth for me?"
    "Now don't get excited man, I'll lay it," said Peggy, "but you leave the dog alone, Mr. Cotter."
    Mr. Cotter said, shaking his head, "It's a bad dog, that dog.
    If you'd give him to me, gaffer, I'd make a dog out of him; but that's a bad dog, he's spoiled. Look at him now." He flicked his clean pocket handkerchief at him.
    Peggy said, "He's a bad dog because he sees you're bad, that's all, Thomas Cotter; a dog knows a man. Now don't tease him man, or I'll make you regret it to your dying day."
    As she entered the hall with things on a tray, there were steps running downstairs and Nellie's lively voice called out, "Is that you, Pop Cotter? How are you, me bold lad?" Half smiling, Peggy went into the unlit dining room where the fire still burned and a snowy starched cloth was laid for the man of the house. Nellie skated down the hall to the kitchen.
    Mr. Cotter sat monumentally in his chair and, as his elder daughter entered, calling, "Hello, Pop Cotter!" he said, "Ah, Mrs. Cook, that was a bad thing you did, there was never a blacker day for this house, than the day you brought that dog in the door. You know what I think about that dog? It's a bad dog! But if the gaffer would only give him to me, I'd know how to treat him. He needs training." Meanwhile, he had fished a red handkerchief out of his trousers' pocket. He flicked it at the dog who growled at