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lose friends in addition to Bill. But even though I was still laden with grief, doubt, fear . . . in some strange way, I felt a certain lightness too.
    “So what’re you gonna do about a living situation?” Gretchen asked.
    “Trying to get rid of me?”
    “You know you can stay at our apartment as long as you want. Like, forever even. My roommates are hardly there anyway.”
    “I don’t know if Bill would appreciate my breaking up our marriage for one long sleepover at your place.”
    “Touché. So? What are you gonna do?”
    I sighed as the barista handed us our drinks. We left the café and started toward the train. “David and I made plans to spend the weekend together, so we’re starting with breakfast tomorrow. I haven’t really thought beyond that. I guess I should start looking for my own place.” The thought made me grimace.
    “Like, your own apartment?” she asked. “What about David?”
    “What about him?”
    “Have you thought about moving in with him?”
    “Um, we should probably date for a while before we get that serious.”
    “Um,” she mimicked, “did you not just end your marriage for him? That’s pretty . . . serious .”
    “No, I know. But really, Gretch, David helped me see the cracks in my marriage. I’m doing this as much for myself as I am for him. And I don’t want to put too much pressure on him.”
    “Pressure?”
    “Well, yeah, that’s a lot of pressure. Ending my marriage for him? I don’t want David to feel like he owes me anything.”
    She sipped her coffee. “Don’t do that.”
    “Do what?” I asked, looking over at her.
    “Don’t prep yourself for disaster before things even get started.”
    “I’m not,” I said defensively. “I’m just trying to be realistic. David and I have time now. I don’t want to push him.” I paused, chewing on my lip. “I mean, I don’t even know if he’s ever lived with anyone.” I realized then that I was essentially leaving my life behind for a man I didn’t know much about.
    Gretchen twisted her lips as she thought. “I don’t know. Dude seems pretty intent on taking things to the next level with you.”
    I laughed. “Yeah, but, don’t forget, he’s a bachelor who’s spent his life doing what he wants . . . and who he wants. This may take some getting used to for him. Like I said, we’ve got something we didn’t have before: time. Time to get to know each other.”
    “True. All right, girl,” she said, breaking off toward her train. “See you tonight?” I started to answer but she stopped, turned and came back to me. “I’m serious, Liv. Don’t start this relationship with one foot out the door. Believe him when he tells you what he wants.”
    I promised her I would and then waved good-bye to my best friend.
    ~
    Gretchen and I had the apartment to ourselves again on Friday night, though this time it was because Ava and Bethany were out partying. I marveled at their active social life. Since I’d arrived the night before, I hadn’t even seen either of them, but I was glad for it. I wasn’t exactly eager to explain why I was staying at their place. I knew Gretchen was sitting the night out to be with me, and it made me all the more grateful for her.
    David had kept in constant contact all day, but I hadn’t heard from him since right before I’d left work. In fact, he’d never answered my last text, but I shrugged it off. I focused on the fact that we’d be meeting in the morning, and I’d be going home with him for an entire weekend. Just me and him, alone. For the weekend. As much as the idea elated me, it also scared me. What if we weren’t as compatible as we’d thought? What if a whole weekend with me was too much for him?
    I spent the rest of the night ignoring that thought as Gretchen and I mindlessly watched reality TV.
    ~
    I hadn’t slept well. My nerves were frayed with anticipation, excitement and unfortunately, guilt. Spending a weekend with another man felt wrong, but spending it