Call the Midlife Read Online Free PDF

knows.
    ‘Also, do anything and everything you can not to get fat. Imagine you’re a Morris Minor and then one day someone comes along and sticks the body of a double-decker bus on your chassis. That’s what happens when we start to pile on the pounds. Same engine, same fuel tank, same suspension and yet somehow we’re surprised whenwe begin to break down. Sometimes we humans and our lack of logic completely bamboozles me.’
    Dr Ed doesn’t do fat.
    ‘Fatness leads to lethargy which leads to immobility, which leads to more fat, more lethargy and eventually seizure, which is the beginning of the end. Not to mention diabetes, which can be horrible and costs the Treasury billions in health care.
    ‘Use it or lose it is the key thing to remember as we get older with all things physical and mental. This is so important. Especially when it comes to your muscles and your brain, which of course is a muscle anyway. As you get older you need to keep moving, which means you need to move more in the first place. Your whole life in fact. Just don’t ever stop. It’s much easier to stay fit than get fit, to maintain rather than rebuild.’
    Dr Ed pauses for a moment and plucks at her bottom lip with one of those long fingers of hers.
    ‘What else is really important?’ she muses.
    And then she screams :
    ‘Oh yes: DON’T BLOODY RETIRE! Whatever you do – DO NOT RETIRE! Unless you absolutely have to or absolutely want to – and you have to be so sure that you want to. Certainly don’t retire because you think you should. So many of my friends in the medical profession have retired and literally fallen off their perch a few months later.’
    She cackles and then checks herself.
    ‘Well, actually it is OK to retire as long as one doesn’t stop being interested and engaged in oneself, the people around and the world in general. But we must always retain a getting-up-and-going-to-bed schedule. This is vital for keeping a shape to our lives. Decide on a healthy regime and make a promise to yourself to stick to it. Do not let it become a choice. And if you do miss an alarm, or press the snooze button once too often, fine yourself in some way. There has to be a consequence to everything we do. When that stops being the case, things begin to go seriously off track.’
    What about all the dreaded cancers?
    ‘Catching cancer early is the absolute name of the game. More people now survive cancer than don’t, but I cannot over-emphasize how important early diagnosis is. You are crazy if you don’t get checked for any cancers you may be particularly vulnerable to. On a regular basis. Or, should you suspect anything in the slightest untoward. The only fear one need have is the fear of doing nothing.’
    Pause.
    And the cue:
    Another glorious outburst.
    ‘And don’t accept ANYTHING that leaves you feeling unsure or uneasy in the slightest.’
    What does she mean exactly?
    ‘What I mean is when things start to creak and threaten to drop off or break down or show signs of wear and tear, if you can, get them fixed immediately. Or at least die trying. DO NOT TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER from yourself or anyone else unless you absolutely have no choice in the matter. And even then I’m not quite so sure.’
    Can we drink?
    ‘A little, yes. More than a little I cannot condone. Not that I don’t indulge myself. I do and I love it, one of life’s great pleasures as far as I’m concerned. If you want to put a figure on it, I can only officially sanction a glass (or two at absolute most) of wine a day. This has been proven to be good for the heart and head when it comes to reducing levels of stress and anxiety. More than that though and you’re on your own.’
    And with that my time was up.
    Thanks Doc.
    ‘Next!’

 
    Drinking
    Top Ten Questions Most Likely to Drive You Mad If You Keep Thinking About Them Too Much:
10
Who am I?
9
Where are am I?
8
How did I get where I am now?
7
Is it where I want to be?
6
Is it where I thought I’d