skin-tight skirt that complemented her every curve. Her blouse was the flashy bright coral of a hibiscus flower.
“What in the name of heaven is she doing here?” the redhead asked Allen.
Allen looked at Ishmael standing in his bathroom in only a towel and grinned.
“Ish—what happened to your hair?” he asked.
“Got rid of it.”
“I like it,” he said.
“You could’ve at least told me you had company when I called this morning,” the redhead said. “Dammit-all-straight-to-hell. This pisses me off! Can’t you keep that thing in your pants?”
Even in her anger, her voice had the honey-sweet drawl of a southern accent.
“Shhh!” Allen whispered. “Keep your voice down. Please . We’ve got customers right below us.”
The redhead inhaled quickly. “Don’t you shush me!”
“It’s not what you think,” Allen defended. “I haven’t been keeping anything from you. She just showed up here this morning.”
Ishmael stepped out of the bathroom, nodding in acknowledgement.
“Hey. I remember you,” Ishmael said. “I ran your husband’s charter business after Allen cheated on me and I quit the coffee shop.” Allen threw his arms up in the air. “It was one night! ”
Ishmael tightened the towel around her.
“I really liked working for Captain Harry,” she said. “Salty as they come. How is he?”
“Oh, he’s doing fabulous. Just added another boat to the fleet, darling. And like all of us, he thinks you’re dead . Now you want to tell me what the hell you’re doing here?”
“Your name’s Diane, right? Wait—” Ishmael turned to Allen. “A married woman? I wouldn’t have thought you’d take it this far.”
“Ish, I didn’t—she’s not— we’re not—listen, this is crazy. Diane and I are just friends. I got her to—”
“I’m listening,” Ishmael said.
“Me too,” Diane said. “This ought to be good.”
“Ish, you’re being paranoid,” Allen said. “We’re not sleeping together. I wouldn’t lie to you.”
Ishmael crossed her arms.
Diane chimed in. “Hon, trust me. I want nothing to do with those scrawny legs. Now let’s all get back to the subject of you and what you’re doing here.”
“Scrawny legs!” Allen bellowed as he peered down incredulously. “Yes, darling,” Diane said, giving her attention briefly to Allen.
“You’ve got a nice back. But your legs are not your forte.”
She turned back to Ishmael with a grin. “I like a man with some girth.”
Diane primped her hair, brushing thick curls from her neck with the flip of a wrist. Her fingernails were the cherry red shine of a sports car.
“I like my legs,” Allen said. “Beatrice likes my legs. I always catch her checking them out.”
“Hold up. I didn’t mean to get us side-tracked,” Diane said.
“Beatrice?” Ishmael said. “No way! Non-fat-half-caff-soy-latte Beatrice? She’s still around? Wow. That means she’s been unsuccessfully trying to sleep with you for over a decade.”
“Really? Beatrice?” Allen suddenly grew pensive as Ishmael rolled her eyes and stomped off to the dresser.
“Hmm. A little jealousy. I like it.” Diane moved into the kitchen. “Like watching a movie. I think I need some refreshments to go with this drama.”
“Look, Ish. The fact is, we’re business partners now—Diane and me,” Allen said. “I got in a little too deep with my side business a few years back, and instead of losing the coffee shop, Diane stepped in and bought a hefty chunk of the joint.”
“No pun intended on the joint part,” Diane said, peering into the fridge. Ishmael looked up from the drawer she was searching through.
“Ah. Yes. Your drug-smuggling side business,” Ishmael said. “Why, Allen! I’m so surprised those marijuana dealings didn’t work out for you.”
“We’re You Java Wonder, LLC now,” he explained. “I don’t own the shop outright anymore.”
Ishmael found the shirt she was looking for. “I can’t believe she let you keep
Aziz Ansari, Eric Klinenberg