Beyond Eighteen Read Online Free PDF

tell me
what he did to Nick. Maybe it’s better I don’t know. Maybe Max
just needs some time to cool off. Besides, if Max won’t tell me
what happened, Joanie will. What the heck is up with her staying at
the Browlers’? I can’t imagine her staying there very long knowing
Cindy will be near, prodding her for details about Max and
me.
    The driver’s side door flung open and the
freezing chill that was lingering and tapping on the windows found
its way in. Max plopped into the driver’s seat, preoccupied and
inattentive. He pushed the key into the starter and the engine
roared to life. Max stole a glance, his eyes dark and distant like
something beyond the problems I’d caused for us by kissing Nick. He
forced the shifter into gear and took off. The car hugged the road,
rounding curves and bends. I tried to find the courage to say
something but couldn’t. Finally, when he reached for the radio, I
said something to break the silence.
    “You know, J didn’t come with us so we could
have some time to talk…alone.”
    I looked over at him. His expression was
stoic as he stared at the road. The muscles in his jaw flexed, his
lips compressed tight, as his eyebrows bent heavy around his
narrowed expression. I swallowed hard, waiting for the pins and
needles to stop attacking my skin.
    He looked like he wasn’t going to engage in
a conversation. His head swayed back and forth, like he was trying
to clear away unwanted thoughts. I felt the influence of the car’s
speed weigh against my chest before I felt my body sway and push
toward him. The seatbelt pulled at my shoulder and before I knew it
we were stopped on the side of a mountainous road. The sun was
dropping behind the trees as night decided to take over.
    Max sat silent for a moment. His head
dropped and his damp, black hair tumbled forward. An endless break
in our lives sat squarely between us as I waited anxiously for
something to come out of his mouth. I wanted to reach over and grab
him, to tell him how much I hated that I hadn’t been there for him
earlier that day as he buried his father. I ached to tell him how
wrecked I felt knowing he’d needed me and I wasn’t there. I wanted
to annihilate the vacancy growing between us so we could just be
Wilson and Max again—a couple who’d fallen in love even when
everything screamed they shouldn’t.
    Max turned to me, his emerald eyes narrow
and clouded with red as every moment of forever lingered between
us. His lips struggled to formulate the words locked in the
wreckage behind his eyes.
    It was like he wanted to open up to me but
something was stopping him. I wanted to know what the hell it was.
What changed from the point where he came back for me and right
now?
    Max cleared his throat before he began to
whisper the thoughts that crowded his head.
    “I can never take back my mistake of
not coming for you; just like you can never take back kissing—” Max
choked as he dropped his eyes from mine. My heart crumbled in my
chest. My eyes stung with regret.
    He continued. “Do you think we can find a
place where we can bury our mistakes and pick up where we left
off?” Max looked at me, his eyes narrow and damp as they wandered
up my body to my face. “Wilson, I am so sorry I never came for you.
I’m sorry I let you…down,” he uttered regretfully.
    Silently I reached over, tangling my fingers
in the random pieces of hair that dangled in front of his eyes. I
pushed them aside as my thumb trailed against his forehead. His
skin was so soft, something I’d missed feeling. He caught my hand
and dragged it down to his lips. I felt his warm, lively breath
push against my palm, his damp soft kiss as he closed his eyes.
    “I love you so much,” I answered as he
opened his eyes and leaned toward me. His jacket collar folded and
fell away from his neck, exposing a cluster of rash-like marks
across the front of his throat. Instantly, I pulled down on his
jacket collar exposing the damage that was so prevalent