Between Shades of Gray Read Online Free PDF Page A

for a few minutes?” asked Jonas. “That way, if Papa is here at the station, he’ll see us. He can’t find us now.”
    “The NKVD won’t let us do much of anything,” said Andrius. “I saw them beat someone who tried to run.”
    “They called us pigs,” said my brother.
    “Don’t listen to them, Jonas. They’re the pigs. They’re stupid pigs,” I said.
    “Shh. I wouldn’t say that,” said Andrius.
    “What are you, the police?” I asked.
    Andrius raised his eyebrows. “No, I just don’t want you to get in trouble.”
    “Don’t get us in trouble, Lina,” said Jonas.
    I looked over toward Mother.
    “I gave them everything I had. I lied and told them he was feeble-minded. I had no choice,” whispered Andrius’s mother. “They would have split us up. Now I have nothing, not even a crumb.”
    “I know,” said Mother, reaching out to the woman. “They did the same with us, and my boy is only ten years old.”
    Ona’s baby wailed. Mrs. Rimas made her way over to Mother.
    “She’s trying to feed the child, but something’s wrong,” said Mrs. Rimas. “The baby’s mouth won’t latch properly.”
    Hours passed like long days. People cried of heat and hunger. The bald man griped about his pain while others tried to organize the space and luggage. I had to surrender my dirt canvas on the floor and instead used my fingernail to carve drawings on the wall.
    Andrius jumped down from the car to go to the bathroom but was punched and thrown back in by the NKVD. We all cringed with each gunshot or scream. No one dared leave the car again.
    Someone discovered a hole, the size of a plate, in the corner where the stubborn woman sat with her daughters. They had been hiding the hole and the fresh air that came from it. People descended upon her, insisting she move. After she had been dragged off the spot, we all took turns using the hole to go to the bathroom. Some just couldn’t bring themselves to do it. The sounds and smells made my head spin. A young boy hung his head from the car and vomited.
    Mrs. Rimas organized the children and began to tell stories. The young kids scrambled toward the librarian. Even the two daughters left their grouchy mother and sat mesmerized by the fantastic tales. The girl with the dolly leaned against Mrs. Rimas and sucked her thumb.
    We sat in a circle on the library floor. One of the younger boys lay on his back, sucking his thumb. The librarian turned through the picture book, reading with an animated voice. I listened and drew the characters in my little notebook. I drew the dragon and my heart began to beat faster. He was alive. I felt a wave of heat from his fiery breath coming at me, blowing my hair back. Then I drew the princess running, her beautiful golden hair tumbling down the mountainside ...
    “Lina, are you ready to go?”
    I looked up. The librarian hovered over me. All of the children were gone.
    “Lina, are you okay? You’re flushed. You’re not feeling ill, are you?”
    I shook my head and held up my notebook.
    “Oh my word. Lina, did you draw that?” The librarian quickly reached for the pad.
    I nodded, smiling.

11
    THE SUN BEGAN TO SET. Mother braided my wavy, sweaty hair. I tried to count how many hours we had spent in the prison box, and wondered how many more we had to go. People ate the food they had brought. Most shared. Some didn’t.
    “Lina, that loaf of bread,” Mother began.
    I shook my head. Was that loaf of bread still there, sitting on my desk? “I don’t have the bread,” I replied.
    “All right,” said Mother, taking some food to Ona. Her lips pursed, she was disappointed.
    Andrius sat with his knees drawn up, smoking a cigarette. He was staring at me.
    “How old are you?” I asked.
    “Seventeen.” He continued to stare.
    “How long have you been smoking?”
    “What are you, the police?” he said, and looked away.
    Night came. It was dark in our wooden box. Mother said we should be thankful they left the door open. I