Beg for Mercy Read Online Free PDF Page A

believed he hadn’t spoken at all. “I don’t want you to visit anymore.”
    “Shut up, Sean. Of course I’m coming back.”
    He shook his head. “I won’t see you.”
    She fell back in her chair. He would do it too. He’d refuse to accept her visits, and the prison wouldn’t force him. “How can you do this to me, Sean?”
    He closed his eyes and shook his head slowly. When he opened his eyes, they held the same peaceful resolve she’d fount>
    “It’s my choice, Sean! Believe me, I can handle this as long as I know there’s still a chance you’ll get out of here alive.”
    “There is no chance. And it’s time you accepted that.”
    She had no words to convince him otherwise.
    “I love you, Megan. You know that, right?”
    “I love you too! But how can you say you love me and make a decision like this?”
    “It’s all going to work out for the best,” he said. “Someday you’ll see.” He kissed his fingers and pressed them up to the glass. “Bye, Megan.”
    Before she could react, he placed his handset back in its cradle.
    “Sean! Wait!” she screamed, even though he couldn’thear her through the soundproof glass. Sean rose from his chair and went to the door to summon the guard.
    Megan pounded her fist on the Plexiglas, but Sean didn’t so much as look back.

    Sean silently followed the guard out the door. With the thick layer of plate glass muting her, he could pretend Megan wasn’t there. He didn’t turn to watch her go. He had to push it away, couldn’t let himself get taken in by her pain. Megan was strong. She would recover.
    He shoved all thoughts of her aside. The emotion that had overwhelmed him at seeing her drained out as quickly as it had filled him, leaving him edgy and overstimulated like he always was after her visits.
    The guard wrapped a hand around his arm and steered him through the visitor’s complex and back to the IMU cell block. Sean struggled to slow his breath, quiet his mind as every cell resisted the idea of going back to his hole.
    He counted every clank of his shackles as they walked down the concrete blue corridor with its yellow cell doors. One, two, three, four… By the time he got to ten, he knew he wasn’t going to try to throw his cuffed wrists around the guard’s neck.
    Eleven, twelve, he heard his guard speak. “What?” Sean said as he lifted his head. Then he realized the guard wasn’t speaking to him, but to another guard escorting a prisoner out of his cell for his exercise hour. It was the guy two cells down from Sean’s, the guy whose screaming jarred Sean from sleep most nights. He didn’t know what the guy was in for, didn’t care.
    It was the first time in two years Sean had seen the man’s face. Their eyes met for a split second, and Sean registered a doughy face and a green tattoo creeping up the guy’s neck before he broke contact. He could feel the guy’s stare as the guards continued their conversation. Sean kept his eyes locked on the floor like a wary dog.
    Heo interest in making any connection, no matter how small.
    The slide of his metal cell door drowned out the squeak of footsteps, and Sean stepped inside. He clenched his teeth as the door clanged shut and put his hands through the slot without being told. Rattle, snick, the cuffs came loose and Sean pulled his hands back inside.
    He sat down on his bunk. Stood up. Went to the sink, bent his head to drink from the faucet. Paced the length of his cell, forward and back, tracing the groove that had worn into the concrete floor from the feet of dozens of poor bastards like him.
    Lying down on his bunk, he closed his eyes and tried to conjure up the blue sky and snow-dusted mountains surrounding his father’s fishing cabin. But all he could see was Megan’s face, pale and tight and wet with tears.
    And another face, beautiful, delicate, with wide-set dark eyes that he’d sworn were pleading for help. His stomach twisted, and for the millionth time he wished he’d never agreed