Ashes to Ashes Read Online Free PDF Page A

fearless.”
    I’m smiling, but all the while my mind is racing, because itwill be my turn soon, and I can’t think of anything. I have so many stories about Rennie, it feels like my whole life on Jar Island has been about Rennie, and yet I can’t think of even one thing. I’m so panicky, I could cry.
    Alex nudges his chin toward Reeve. “You’re up.”
    Reeve shrugs his shoulders. “Pass.”
    Ash tries to sweet-talk him into sharing something, but he won’t. She’s persistent, but it only makes Reeve shut down even more. The muscles in his shoulders are bunched up, and he’s two seconds from getting up and walking out of here, I know it. I throw Ash a warning look so she’ll stop.
    â€œPJ, you go,” I say, and PJ launches into a story about Rennie sneaking into the boys’ bathroom, and everyone starts to laugh, and the tension of the moment before fades away. Our eyes meet, and I can tell Reeve is grateful. Right before it’s my turn, I get up and go to the bathroom, and I don’t come out until I’m sure they’ve moved on to the next person.
    *  *  *
    After midnight some people have left and some are passed out in the living room and in Rennie’s bedroom, I guess because everybody started drinking so early. I am on Paige’s bed with Paige and Ash. They are both asleep, but I’m just lying here. I finally get up and open the bedroom door.
    In the living room the TV is on and Reeve is cleaning, tyingup a big recycling bag. I watch him for a few seconds, and I suddenly feel such longing for him in my heart, I ache. I’m about to say something when Alex comes out of the kitchen. I step back into Paige’s room before they notice me.
    I hear Alex say, “How are you holding up?”
    I can hear the surprise in Reeve’s voice when he says, “I’m all right.”
    â€œCome on, man. I know how much you cared about her.” Alex pauses. “I’m still pissed at you for going after Lillia—”
    â€œThat’s over.”
    It hurts to hear him say it, but it’s time.
    Then Alex says, “If you ever want to talk—I’m here for you.”
    There’s this long beat, and I’m holding my breath, hoping. Hoping that Reeve will let him in. Alex has always known how to talk to Reeve. His opinion is the only one Reeve has ever really cared about besides Rennie’s.
    Gruffly Reeve says, “I’m good. But thanks.”
    I let out the breath I was holding. Then I hear Alex say, “All right,” and then a few seconds later the front door opens and closes.
    I step out, thinking it’s Reeve who left. Only it wasn’t.
    Reeve looks up and sees me standing there. “Oh, hey,” he says, startled.
    â€œHey,” I say. I busy myself picking up plastic cups.
    We work in silence. When we’re almost done, I hear a muffled sound, and I look up and see Reeve, his back to me, his shoulders shaking. He’s crying.
    I go completely still. For a few seconds I’m not sure what to do for him. Then I realize I do know. I don’t look at him when I say, “Just go. I’ll finish up here.”
    Reeve takes a ragged breath. Then he gets his coat, says “Bye, Cho,” and leaves. When he’s gone, I burst into tears.

Chapter Seven
KAT
    I CAN’T GET M ARY OUT of my head.
    So Monday morning, I cut first period and go looking for Ms. Chirazo. Maybe she can tell me something about where Mary went. Just because Mary isn’t locked up in the attic with her freaky aunt doesn’t mean I have the best feeling about what could have happened to her. The guidance secretary doesn’t see me come in, she’s on the phone, so I just walk straight into Ms. Chirazo’s office.
    She’s not there.
    I wait for a few minutes, feeling stupid. I’m not sure whatMs. Chirazo is going to be able to tell me. I bet there are privacy laws and