As I Breathe (One Breath at a Time: Book 2) Read Online Free PDF Page A

stammered, stomping my foot for effect. My eyes pulled together tightly, piercing into hers. I could feel my cheeks turning red. I pulled back from her grip. “Stop! You’re hurting me. I’m telling Grandma on you.” I threatened in my best brat mode. “You promised you wouldn’t get mad.” I snickered at her.
    My mother rivaled blueberry punch stains everyday, which are stubborn, but not as stubborn as I was. Most definitely, I was my mother’s cross to bear, at times, but she never accused me of being such a demanding child.
    “Do not challenge me, Brielle. You don’t need to understand everything right now, except that there are no such things as voices in your head and that people will call you terrible names if you talk about them. No more voices...make them go away or—or a doctor will...” Her words had sharp edges.
    A doctor? What would the doctor do to me? The threat of a doctor was enough to scare me into obeying.
    “ Okay, no doctors. But, why?” I cried. Tears dampened my cheeks. My mother offered no explanation. Of course, I was five years old at the time so why should she have to explain.
    “ Because I said so...don’t ask me any more questions. Just obey me or—or I will—I will spank you,” she practically growled. Her teeth clinched tightly between her words as she scolded me.
    “ Momma, you’re scaring me.”
    She bit her bottom lip, hard, as if even she was shocked by her own threats. Her face reddened and she shut her eyes. My mother had never threatened to spank me prior to that day. This was also the one and only time in my life she used the lame phrase, “Because I said so ” as many parents do and will continue to do through the ages.
    I stood there shaking like a leaf. Tears welled in my eyes. The grave seriousness in my mother’s tone, in that moment, caused me to fear her for the very first time. She paced my room, back and forth, speechless. Then, she suddenly buckled to her knees and began sobbing.
    “Please, it’s okay...I’m sorry, sweetheart. I would never spank you. I promise, but—” She hung her face to hide her tears from me.
    I dried my tears with my tiny fingers. I assured her that my invisible friends would never hurt me. This made her emotional angst worsen; she burst into uncontrollable cries. This frightened me to death. I was afraid she would never stop crying, and I would be the one to blame.
    “Mom...my, I promise, I will never talk to them again. Don’t cry, Mommy,” I pleaded with her. Between her cries, she pleaded with me too, reinforcing once again, that I was to never speak to the voices in my head ever again.
    My mother held true to her promise and, through the years, she had never paddled me either. Over time, the voices disappeared and life went on as usual. Well, until it didn’t anymore.
     
     
    -2-
    An Understanding
     
    On a rainy night, long after the voices had vanished, I crawled into my bed. My herd of stuffed animals stared back at me in my dimly lit room. The shadow from the moon shining through my window distorted the images of my dolls, making them look haunted in the dark. I shut my eyes, pulling the blanket over my head and hummed my favorite song: “Hush A Bye Mountain.” I knew every word. I learned it from watching the movie Chitty Chitty Bang Bang over and over again.
    The movie and my repetitive watching of it often helped me to fall asleep. Then, like magic, the music and the words manifested into something much more than just the music that lulled me to sleep every night.
    The song grew louder and louder, mixing with my voice. My eyes batted open, and I sprang up to investigate the change. The lullaby was not playing on the radio or on the television, but instead, it originated inside my head.
    “ You’re back,” I blurted out. I covered my mouth, trying to stifle my words. I couldn’t talk to them, remembering I’d made a promise. Despite my efforts to ignore them, the voices continued to sing. They sounded so