Any Red-Blooded Girl Read Online Free PDF Page B

absolutely necessary. The situation was
a fight waiting to happen.
    Quickly, I shoved a change of clothes and a
towel into my beach bag. “I’m taking a shower,” I announced,
glancing around to see if anyone was paying attention.
    For the umpteenth time, my father’s head was
buried in a road atlas, so he was oblivious. But my mother was
poised to confront me at the tiki torch. As I braced for an
argument over Mick, though, she hit me with a totally unexpected
plan of attack instead.
    “A shower? That sounds great!” she effused.
“Hold on. I’ll go with you.”
    “Huh?”
    “I’m dying for a hot, steamy one,” she
claimed. “Just let me get my…”
    Great. This was definitely not going to work.
I could not have the Mental Hygienist tagging along like my
BFF.
    “I’m sick,” I blurted. “I don’t feel good.
Everyone should stay away from me.”
    “What’s the matter? Do you have a fever?” my
mother asked, rushing to my side and clamping her palm over my
forehead. “No. No fever,” she decided after a few seconds of
monitoring me.
    “It’s my stomach. I think I have the flu,” I
said, bending halfway over and clutching my guts. “I’ll probably be
in the bathroom for like two hours. Can you get me some Pepto?”
    I could tell by the skeptical look on my
mother’s face that she didn’t believe me. But I also knew she’d
never go so far as to deny me medicine.
    “Geez, Flora, I don’t think we brought any
Pepto. But I might have a roll of Tums in my purse. You could try
those.”
    “Come on. I need the Pepto, Mom. I’m
sick,” I whined. Then I faked the beginning of a dry heave.
    “Okay, okay,” she finally relented. “I’ll go
to the store. I’ll get some Pepto—if they have it. Do you want your
father to walk you to the bathroom? Vic, come here!” she yelled,
before I could respond. “Flora’s sick. I’m going for Pepto. Can you
walk her to the bathroom?”
    “Ab-SO-lutely! I can,” my goofball father
shouted.
    For a second, I thought about arguing that I
didn’t need a bathroom escort. But then I realized getting rid of
my dad would be a piece of cake once my mother was gone. Still,
without waiting for him to follow, I plowed full steam ahead. And
when he finally caught up to me a few campsites away, I pulled out
the big guns. I had to.
    “I think I forgot my bra. Can you go back and
get it for me?” I asked innocently.
    Nothing freaked my father out like female
undergarments or that time of the month . And yes, I realize
this was a cruel move, but I was desperate.
    “Uh…um…” he stumbled. “We could turn around.”
He glanced longingly back at our tent.
    “I can’t,” I whimpered. “My stomach. I’ve
gotta hurry.” I picked up my pace even further, forcing him into a
quick decision.
    “All right,” he crumbled. “Where is it?”
    “In my duffel. In the side pocket. But make
sure you get the pink one with the yellow polka dots, not the blue
one with the green stripes. The blue one’s too tight, and I’m
already sick.”
    “Pink with yellow polka dots. Check. I’ll
meet you at the showers.”
    Now I know I probably should have felt guilty
about sending my dad on a wild goose chase, since the pink
polka-dotted bra was still at home in my underwear drawer. But
honestly, I didn’t really feel that bad at all. I mean, sometimes a
girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do, right?
    In case my father gave up on the elusive bra
hunt sooner than anticipated, though, I ditched my beach bag in the
bushes and ducked behind the expansive rows of tents. Because if I
remembered correctly, the RVs were at the back of the campground.
And that’s where I should be able to find the blue and silver
pickup that belonged to my sweet, sweet Mick.
    I’d only passed about five unfamiliar
campsites when I recognized his rich, velvet voice. “Flora, hi.
Over here,” he called.
    When I laid eyes on him again, my heart
literally skipped a beat. Because even though he’d been