Against the Odds Read Online Free PDF

like to do something special for them, but with the impending
news from the attorney, it’s just not a good time. 
    I walk out of the bedroom in search of stamps
and Robert. I stop at Jamie’s bedroom. The door is open and her
room is bright. The sunshine shines through her windows, bringing
life into the room. When Jamie died, we left the curtains and door
closed; it was just too sad to look in. Now, when I walk past and
see her bed and her personal things, I am reminded of how much I
love her, how much I loved having her here. Looking on the
nightstand, I see her pictures are missing. They have been moved
into the nursery for the new baby to enjoy. I smile. It’s probably
the first I had been near Jamie’s room in a long
time.  
    I say, “I love you, baby girl,” before
turning towards the nursery across the hall. I look into the sage
green and white nursery. I smile. It is so inviting, beautiful, and
sweet. I place my hand on my belly and walk into the room. Walking
around the room, I look at and touch everything. I open the dresser
drawers and they are empty. It saddens me. I open the closet and it
is also empty. I have less than two months, and this baby doesn’t
have anything to wear. I’ve been in mourning over Jamie and trying
to accept that we may — we do — have a five-year-old daughter, and
so I haven’t focused on this baby. I know what I need to do and I
decide that today I’ll do it.  
    I expect to find Robert working out, but I
find him at the kitchen table, instead. He is sitting there
shirtless, wearing his gray sleep pants. Sitting in front of him is
a box that holds Jamie’s things. A locket of her hair, her baptism
dress, and the records from the hospital, among other things. I get
a knot in my belly, almost like a feeling of doom. He looks up at
me with sadness spread across his face. I know my Robert tries to
hold it together, but I also know he struggles with it. I need to
be strong for him, although the black cloud is
hovering.  
    “ Good morning, Ace,” I say
as I walk over to sit next to him at the
table.  
    He tries to smile, but his smile is weak.
“Good morning, Sweets.” He clears his throat and says, “We got a
call today.” 
    He doesn’t have to say
anything else. I know it’s from the attorney. Before, when he said
that I would have thought it was a call from Gus about a fight. But
today, I know it’s from Bruce and it is about the baby swap. Keep it together, Leah.   
    “ When do we meet with
them?” I try to make my voice stay monotone. I don’t want my voice
to reflect my inner hysteria.  
    “ Tomorrow morning. Bruce
said the parents and child are supposed to be there with
their attorneys.” 
    Keep it together,
Leah. “Good, I’m ready to meet our
daughter,” I say honestly. That came out
unexpectedly, but it’s the truth.   
    “ You are?” Robert looks up
and I can see hope in his eyes.  
    I’m never the strong one
in the family and it feels good. “I
am.” Am I? Don’t wiggle out now, Leah.
Hold it together for Robert. I can do this. “We have another daughter and I want to be involved in her
life. I’m ready for us to be her parents.” This honesty thing is working out. To verbally say what you
really think, it feels good. “I’m ready to
be her mom. But I have some things that need to get done
today.” 
    The sadness is leaving Robert’s face and he
asks, “Like what?” 
    “ Like mail these,” I say,
holding up the thank you cards. “I want to shop for our
five-year-old daughter.” 
    “ Some clothes and toys to
make her feel welcome when she comes. That sounds like a good
idea.” 
    “ And I want to shop online
for the baby. He has nothing to wear when he gets
here.” 
    “ He?” he
asks. 
    “ Or
she.”  
    “ Or she,” he repeats. “It
would be nice if we knew what to shop for. Pale pinks or baby
blues.”  
    I ponder his words. It would be nice. Will we
have another daughter or will it be a