A Tragic Heart Read Online Free PDF Page A

undressed, and start a bath for myself. While in the bath, I take a razor and cut my wrists. Not to kill myself, just to bleed a little. I watch as the droplets of blood mix with my bath water. I like to think that I’m sacrificing myself and asking God for forgiveness for the sins that I’ve caused. For my father’s sin of helping to create me and my mother’s sin of making the decision to have me.
And in that moment, I feel saved
…
    ***
    Sunday is a drag, but what else is new? I speak to Mason for a few hours and decide to read his writings and poetry. He’s a true talent. His words are like the perfect chords and lyrics. I wonder if it’s possible to fall in love in a week. If it is, I think I’m in love with Mason Taylor.
    On Monday, I walk into the school building hand in hand with Mason. Everyone stares, but I can’t blame them. Last week, I was the freak who no one spoke to; this week, I’m the president’s wife. It’s all brand new to me, so it feels a little weird to be around Mason and his crew all day long. He won’t even let me sit at my table during lunch. I sit at his usual table, the only quiet one besides Peyton. I couldn’t help but stare at Peyton and wonder if he still feels the pain his mother’s death caused. I wonder if he thinks about her every time he’s quiet or alone.
I know I think about it a lot
. I just wonder how much Peyton and I truly are alike. One of these days,I’d love to talk to him about everything he’s been through. I want him to tell me his secrets and to tell him mine. For some odd reason, I want us to be best friends…maybe like Jackson and me.
    “So Taylor, what are you going to do about Jizelle?” Peyton asks.
    “What do you mean?”
    “Well, you know she and her followers are really hating you right now. They may even try something.”
    “Let them. I don’t care. She saw what happened to her last time.”
    “Oooh, wow! You know, I really like you. Just letting you know if they try anything I’m on your side,” he says with that smile that’s just as beautiful as Mason’s.
    “Thanks, Peyton.” I blush.
    “Hey, Peyton man, I don’t appreciate you calling my girl a follower,” Jagger protests.
    “It is what it is, man,” Peyton responds dryly.
    I love how he has my personality. He doesn’t care about what comes out of his mouth; he just says it. But somewhere deep down, there’s something very insecure about him. It’s a something I’d like to get to know.
    Mason and I have to stay after school with Mrs. Storms to tell her how the story is coming along. She loves the story so far, but she tells us that it’s for some contest, so we have to work on perfecting it. She says she’s really captivated by the main character.
    “I told you that you’d make a great story,” Mason says, putting his arm around my shoulders as we walk through the school hallway. I catch Jizelle, Keely, and Alison’s cold stares, but that doesn’t bother me.
I have Mason, and that is that
.
    ***
    The next month goes by smoothly. I’m still with Mason. We won the writing contest and we got our story published. Best of all, I have not once picked up a razor or a box cutter. Mason has truly changed me. He’s helped me become a person I thought never existed. He’s everything a girl wishes her boyfriend could be. He’sa gentleman, polite, spontaneous, and romantic—not to mention that he’s an entertaining host of sleepovers.
    It’s now July, my birthday month, and Mason keeps promising me this will be a birthday that I will never forget. I try to get him to tell me what he has planned, but he refuses. He just lets me know that I won’t be disappointed.
    “Mason, just tell me already! You know I hate surprises!” I say in a whiny voice, while letting the ocean waves hit my feet.
    “Wait for three more days and you’ll find out!”
    “But Mason—”
    “Taylor!”
    “Yes?” I say in a soft voice.
    “Do you love me?”
    “You know that I do. Why bother