Whose Angel Keyring Read Online Free PDF Page B

tell you, not whether --for I believe it is your right to know. Your father disagrees (at least for now) but agrees in principle. We both want what is best for you. We always have.
    How must it feel, my darling boy, to know the mother who loves you is not the one who gave birth to you? I do not know, for I have not been in your situation. I can guess it might be a terribly sad and lonely thing to discover that the person who brought you into this world might not have wanted you after all.
    My hope is this will be counter- balanced by the fact that there is someone in this world who wanted you more than anything else. How can I describe my desire to find you, know you, bring you home, become a family with you at its center? I cannot, for my desire exceeded reason and rational thought, and the heart cannot speak in words.
    You give me more happiness than I ever thought was possible to find in this world. As your tiny steps become larger, my heart swells with pride and anticipation. When I answer your endless questions, I thrill at the scope of your curiosity. When I read you bedtime stories, I watch the seeds of big ideas take root in your eager mind, and then marvel that in hours-- or minutes--the ideas have already begun to flower.
    It pains me that I won’t be able to see how you develop. And yet, looking down the future is like looking across a wide sea. I can follow your boat a long distance before it slips over the horizon.
    Already I can see your qualities. You’ll have a profound impact on your father, and you have much to learn from Joseph. You, Zackery, have special gifts that may not come fully to fruition till later in your life. But be patient with yourself and let them unfold--they certainly will.
    Someday you may want to search for your birth parents. If you do, be kind, if you can. Whoever she was--the woman who gave birth to you--she may have been in circumstances that were so overwhelming, the choice of keeping and raising you was taken away from her.
    I never knew who the birth parents were--the terms of the adoption did not allow them to know us, or us to know them. I don’t know what good would come from finding them. But I can appreciate the drive to understand your genetic history.
    Your emotional history, however, can best be discovered by understanding your father. He has such dreams for you! And yet, good man that he is, he will never insist you follow them. If it happens that you have, then perhaps by now you two are jointly running Calvin Oil. How I would have loved to see that day, for I am convinced you’d make a formidable team and realize dreams of success beyond what either of you could achieve independently.
    Your father has some secrets. So does everyone who leads a rich, complex life. Some of his secrets I will never know--the years before you were born he had a government job of which he spoke very little. His real dream was the company--and you.
    If I have any advice to offer, it is this: some of the most significant accomplishments in your life will be disguised as simple things: kindness toward a spouse, patience toward a child, understanding toward your flawed parents.
    Mostly, my dear, wonderful son, I want you to know you are loved. Were the choice mine, I would never leave you. Wherever I go, I will always know, remember and cherish you. As surely as I know my own name, I know my love will stay with you always.
    I hear a distant call, now, and have no choice but to follow where it leads.
    Remember when we used to watch the ships disappear over the horizon? We never worried about them, because we knew they were fine. They were just continuing their journey, and so shall I.
    Perhaps we’ll meet again one lovely day. Until then I wish you happiness in love and success in life. I wish you fair skies and a following sea.
    All my love forever,
    Mom
    (Joan Grace Calvin)

    Her signature seemed to swim on the blue page, like letters floating on a pool. Zack swiped at his face to push away