When We Were Sisters Read Online Free PDF Page B

great an A is and the one who has to let them know it’s not all right when they don’t do homework or study. It’s always something, and I’m always right here taking care of it. Nobody else is around to deliver bad news.”
    It was as close to an indictment of Kris as I’d ever made in Cecilia’s presence. I was immediately sorry. She didn’t need more ammunition against him.
    â€œMaybe they aren’t angry at you .”
    â€œAngry at the world?” I shrugged.
    â€œAngry at their father for not being around while they’re growing up.”
    I started to protest but didn’t get far. Because I know that Nik, in particular, needs more time with Kris. He’s twelve, tall and gangly and, according to his pediatrician, already into puberty. We started the “birds and the bees” discussion years ago in this garden, where the birds and the bees are actual residents, but the last thing my son wants now is to talk about sexual feelings or his changing body with his mother. And when can he talk to his father? Not on the fly during the rare times when Kris drops him at school on his way into work. Not late at night when Kris stumbles home so exhausted he can hardly remember his own name.
    â€œIt’s a problem,” I said. “Kris is a hot commodity. We don’t see a lot of him.”
    She wisely didn’t follow up on that, at least not exactly. “Remember the night of the accident, when we chatted and I told you I needed to talk to you about something?”
    I thought back and was glad I could remember. “You told me not to put you off.”
    â€œDo you remember when I was in Australia on tour?”
    â€œYou got the flu and laryngitis and had to cancel the last week or so of concerts, right? Every time I called, Donny said you were fine but resting your voice.”
    â€œI had a...” She angled her body toward me so she could see my face. “I had what they used to call a nervous breakdown. Now whatever they call it comes down to long paragraphs of psychobabble. But in essence, I had about a month when I couldn’t function. I was in a hospital for two of those weeks.”
    â€œCeCe...” I covered her hand with mine. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
    â€œWhat would you have done? Flown to Australia? Worried? Besides, I had to deal with my problems on my own. I needed time to cry and think. I did a lot of both.”
    I didn’t know what to say. Cecilia is the strongest person I know, but even strong people can snap under the right pressure.
    â€œA lot of it was exhaustion,” she said. “I chopped the old candle into a thousand pieces and burned every one of them at both ends. There was a doctor there I liked, a woman, Dr. Joan. She said that anybody who works as hard as I do is always avoiding something.”
    â€œWhat were you avoiding?”
    â€œYou know better than anybody. Where I come from. Who I was. Who I am now. What I never had. The whole nine yards.”
    â€œMost people would find even one of those topics intimidating.”
    She laughed a little. “Devoted to making everything as momentous as possible. That’s me.”
    Even without makeup, even wearing a man’s loose dress shirt, Cecilia is beautiful. She hasn’t always been. She grew slowly into her quirky, oversize features, but by the time she turned eighteen her carroty hair had darkened to a spectacular auburn and her figure had ripened into something astonishing. She’s lovely up close, but onstage? Onstage she’s a goddess.
    â€œHow are you now?” I asked, because to look at her, no one would know she’d ever experienced turmoil, much less recently.
    â€œDetermined.”
    â€œYou’re always determined. You’ve been determined since the day we met. You always have a plan.”
    â€œThis is a little different. Before I was determined to remake myself, to pretend I was somebody