What to Expect the Toddler Years Read Online Free PDF Page B

dishwasher (after you’ve safely removed the knives, forks, and other sharp utensils), hand you clothes from the dryer, turn off the lights when leaving a room, and a multitude of other simple daily tasks that will seem exciting to your little scientist.
    Supply substitutes. When he goes for the freshly folded stack of clothes on the bed, move them out of reach. But give him a couple of towels or T-shirts to drape about him, drag behind him, or play peekaboo with. You might even show him how to fold the towels, then let him practice folding and unfolding to his heart’s content. When he wants to program the DVR, give him a toy that has buttons to push and dials to turn. Or let him play with a remote that has no batteries. Does your toddler love to experiment with fluids? Give him plenty of opportunity by supplying a variety of plastic containers to fill and empty during bath time.
    Play down infractions. While it’s important to stop unwanted behavior immediately, it’s also important not to make a big issue of it. Toddlers tend to repeat actions that get a major reaction, whether the reaction is positive or negative. When feasible, use low-key distraction techniques, such as humor, rather than scolding.
B ANGING ON EVERYTHING
    “Our son bangs on everything in sight—the kitchen table, the living room curio cabinet, the TV—I’m afraid he’ll damage something or hurt himself.”
    Many a young toddler seems to be preparing for a career as a rock and roll drummer. And this penchant for banging the day away is as normal as itis common. These pint-size percussionists not only relish the rhythmic sounds they produce, but also delight in the reactions (negative though they may be) their performances elicit from their audience. (Banging is, after all, pretty hard to ignore, particularly in the middle of a phone conversation, a Thanksgiving dinner, or a stressful day.) The young drummer derives pleasure, too, from another potential consequence of his music-making: mess-making. As he bangs, it amuses him to see peas and carrots sailing off his plate, knickknacks dancing in the curio cabinet, magazines flying off the coffee table.
    Though you don’t want to completely quash your toddler’s musical endeavors, there is a limit to how much banging a home and its inhabitants can take. So set some limits:
    Stop dangerous drumming promptly. Banging on the television set, a glass-topped table, a dinner plate, or a window can lead to serious injury, damage, or both: Bring this action to a halt without delay. Stop the music, too, before the vibration from your toddler’s banging on the table upsets a cup of hot coffee or topples a vase of flowers. “No banging on the . . .” is a good start, but chances are actions will speak louder than words. Hence, you will also need to separate your junior musician from his “instrument of the moment” and quickly provide a substitute instrument or other distraction. Don’t succumb to the temptation to shout over the banging; keep your voice soft yet firm and deliberate. Unpleasant behaviors like banging tend to be intensified rather than squelched by parental anger. There’s also a chance (albeit a small one) that if he can’t hear you over the sound of his one-man band, he’ll be intrigued enough by the movement of your lips to stop and listen.
    Stopping your toddler from drumming on a forbidden surface once does-n’t mean he’s going to refrain on his own in the future. It takes more than a few “no’s” (and often more than a few hundred) to train a toddler. He’ll likely test you many times by trying the wooden spoon out on the coffee table or the truck on the glass doors before he gets the message. Till then, you’ll have to stay alert to catch him, and stop him in the act.
    Redirect his banging impulses. When you gotta bang, you gotta bang. So let him let loose—on safe surfaces. Offer him an old pot and a wooden spoon, a toy drum and rubber-tipped drumsticks, a child’s