graduating from Brown University too many years ago to count. The title, âThe Sensual You Self-Testâ; the questions, such as âHow do you feel about public displays of affection?â; and their multiple-choice answers all had the ring of a cheesy womenâs magazine self-help quiz. Last night sheâd refused to partake, but this morning, while waiting for her teammates, guilt had set in. She was already here, so what the hell. And, as Dee had drilled into her head, she might just learn a thing or two.
âShopping, and not sure if itâs real or faux fur? Bâ¦feel it,â Pia declared, and marked her answer. âFree hour? Aâ¦get a massage. Sexy elevator music? Meeting? Bâ¦listen, lust, and then get back to work.â
She continued down the list of queries and possible answers without incident until she got to question number eight: âWhat qualities are you most looking for in a lover?â
âA high sperm count,â Pia joked aloud before her giggles quickly fell silent. Even when sex and relationships had been a steady part of her everyday life, she hadnât thought much about what she really
wanted
in a man. She usually just took the package as presentedâaccepting and valuing the noble qualities and ignoring the flaws for as long as she could before moving on or being pushed aside. Never had she sat and definitively decided what special qualities she was looking for in the man she wanted to love.
âPassion and adventure? Looks and humor? Stability and wealth? Why is there no âall of the aboveâ? Because that would be way too easy,â she asked and answered for herself. Pia thought for several minutes before her choice came to her. She had to say that the qualities that would in fact aid in the pursuit of all the others were passion and adventure.
Testing complete, Pia quickly checked the answer key and equivalency table and added up her score. Consulting the âsensuality index,â she was pleased to learn that based on her score of six
B
âs and four
A
âs, she was still a solidly sensual woman at least on paper.
Satisfied with her results, Pia sat back and watched as the steady flow of workshop participants began, and within ten minutes theyâd all gravitated to their newly formed teams. Rebecca arrived and the two women waited several more minutes before a visibly upset Flo joined them.
âHowâd you do?â Rebecca asked as she nodded toward Piaâs self-test.
âOkay.â
âWell, according to this, Iâm Supersensual.â Her smile was a combination of pride and disbelief.
âGo âhead, Jessica Simpson,â Pia responded, keeping her surprise in check. Of all people, Rebecca was the last sheâd have pegged as living a hedonistic lifestyle.
âWell, I didnât do so well,â Flo volunteered in a flat voice. âIt looks like I am about as sensual as a rock. My score makes me too sensible to be sensual. Itâs no wonderâ¦â Her voice trailed off into a void of self-pity. Pia and Rebecca traded looks, not knowing whether the polite and proper thing would be to probe further or leave it alone.
âRemember what Joey said,â Pia offered. âThis test isnât to make you feel bad about yourself but to give you an indication of where you stand and what you need to work on.â
âYeah, well, too late. I feel horrible and apparently I need to work on everything,â Flo said. Silence, heavy with the embarrassment that comes when strangers confess the intimate details of their personal lives, settled around them.
âI donât know how much to believe this test, âcause my score definitely doesnât match my love life,â Rebecca revealed, politely trying to take the focus away from Florence. âGuys just donât get meâat least not the ones I like. When I go out, itâs like Iâm invisible. They want hot girls