fields, I was as strong as them and could run fast enough to stay with them. I started borrowing clothes from them, not from Katrin or the other women.
"They started teaching me to sharpen knives. When I could do that well, they taught me to butcher animals. When I could do that, they started teaching me to shoot. I found all of this extraordinarily easy. I was soon shooting more accurately than many of their boys, and I could draw a bow that many of their men could not. Then they started taking me hunting, but first with snares only. Later with the bow.
"Meanwhile, of course, I was spending the rest of my days and all of my nights with Katrin. She was at least as fit as I was. There were a few nights when we did not sleep at all.
"During the day, I was becoming more and more a man." Her face twisted and the dagger she was holding grated over the sharpening stone before she controlled herself with an effort.
"Katrin did not like her women to be men. She grew bored of me while I was falling more in love with her. When I didn't change from pants back to skirts one day, I could tell she was done with me. That night, I couldn't bear to sleep next to her. It was a mild night, so I stayed outside, talking to the guards, then to the next shift. I didn't sleep all night. In the morning, I still didn't need sleep." Camille shrugged with one shoulder, then swapped the sharp dagger for an arrowhead which she began turning over and over in her fingers.
"Everyone in the clan had known it would happen. They had expected it. This was Katrin's pattern, apparently. I was merely the latest. I asked, of course. None of her previous pets," she spat the word out, "had stayed with the clan. But some had stayed with Katrin for as much as three months before she got tired of them. I had lasted nearly four. I think she found me more of a challenge.
"So I left." Camille began sharpening the arrowhead with gentle, smooth strokes, turning it over frequently. Her voice had returned to a calm, matter-of-fact, tone. "When I found out that this was Katrin's pattern, there seemed to be no use trying to hide my intentions or not own up to the fact I had been used. So I just came right out and told the chief that evening. He just nodded and told me to speak with the blacksmith. He didn't give me his blessing, tell me he was sorry to see me go, or say it was about time. He just said, 'Talk to Grueng,' and took another drink."
Camille tested the arrowhead, placed it on the bench next to her and picked up another one. "Half the men of the tribe were by Grueng's caravan. Blacksmiths are always at the centre of any tribe. Villages are the same."
Helgaer, still listening in frozen fascination, found herself nodding in agreement.
"Grueng saw it in my face and went inside his caravan without saying anything. The others began saying their goodbyes. Grueng came out with a bow and a quiver with 20 arrows, a short sword and a dagger, and said 'Here. You've earned these.'" For a second, the ghost of a smile passed Camille's face. "Someone else produced a blanket. I wasn't wearing a jacket. Someone gave me a new one. One of the old women appeared with a sack containing a water skin, bread and cold meat. She greeted me, then farewelled me like she would a man.
"I had been with them long enough to realise that this meant my goodbyes were done—there would not be any protracted scene. So I left." A fierce grin appeared on Camille's face. "I had not gone beyond the light from their caravans before Katrin appeared with an expression on her face like a thundercloud. I think she was angry I had been the first to end what we had and had robbed her of the opportunity.
"Before she could say anything, I said goodbye as a Gharaj man would to a Gharaj woman and turned my back on her. Some of the men had followed me far enough for Katrin to see them. The Gharaj would have arguments you could hear for leagues, but only if they thought they were in the right. Katrin knew she