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the only reason she hasn’t yet threatened him with hellfire is because she doesn’t know where to get it.
    I took pity on him and changed the subject.
    By then we’d reached my place and were in the kitchen. Seemed that having his life endangered for eating forbidden food had given Tack an appetite. He asked right away if there was anything to snack on. I got some bread and peanut butter out, along with a couple of knives. We don’t bother with plates unless my mom is around to insist.
    â€œWant jam?” I asked.
    â€œGot any grape jelly?”
    I looked. There was none. He settled for strawberry jam, and we put together a couple of sandwiches and flopped on the couch to eat them.
    That was when my sister Lynn came storming through the door, bawling her eyes out.

chapter five
    T he sight of my sister sobbing alarmed me, but not because of any worry over what might be wrong with her. I’d seen her bawling enough times through the years that I’d become immune to it by then. My main concern was that she might waste a bunch of my time with some stupid story about the latest fight between her and her boyfriend, Conor Sweeney.
    The main thing to remember in that kind of situation is that you should act like you care without encouraging too much talk.
    â€œIt’ll be okay,” I said. You have to say something .
    â€œN…n…no, it wo…wo…won’t,” she blubbered.
    It takes experience to learn how to shut this kind of drama down as fast as possible. I had plenty of practice. The problem: Tack had none.
    I saw him shift in his chair and turn to face her. I saw his mouth start to open — saw it like it was happening in slow motion. I knew he was going to say something and that whatever it was, it would be the wrong thing.
    Sadly, I was powerless to stop him.
    â€œWhat’s wrong, Lynn?”
    A long, tortured NOOOOOOOOOO echoed in my head. Too late.
    â€œI…I b…b…broke up with C...Con…or.” This brought on renewed hysterics.
    (Every time they break up she claims she did the dumping, which is not even close to the truth.)
    Tack blundered on.
    â€œAw, that’s too bad,” he told her. I silently willed him not to ask what happened, so of course the next words out of his mouth were “What went down?”
    You’d almost wonder how a person could get to be Tack’s age without knowing better than that. Sure, he’s only got brothers, but he should have learned something from the girls he’s gone out with. From what I’ve seen, they all operate pretty much the same.
    It took all of my willpower to keep from snorting or rolling my eyes or doing anything else to make what was coming worse.
    â€œConor,” Lynn said through her sobs and tears, “forgot the anniversary of our first kiss.”
    Tack looked confused. Why wouldn’t he? He was probably thinking, That’s it? All this wailing and wet-eye is because the poor sap forgot a stupid date? Thankfully, he didn’t say anything like that out loud.
    Lynn reached into her purse, brought out a package of Kleenex, tugged one out and blew her nose. Then she was ready to go on.
    â€œI’m sure you can imagine how awful that made me feel, Tack. I was just devastated.”
    Tack looked like a cornered animal. His eyes darted to the left and right, but there was no way out. He mumbled something that sounded like, “Rats tube hat.” I wasn’t sure if I’d misheard, or if he was too panicked to form a sentence.
    â€œI knew that if Conor could forget something that important, our relationship was in serious trouble.” Lynn dabbed at her eyes with a fresh Kleenex. “To be honest, I should have seen this coming. I’ve felt us growing apart — women can sense these things. And we really hadn’t been working on our relationship the way we should have been.
    â€œBut the worst part is, it tells me Conor doesn’t