streams. Commander Niu sent one of his bodyguards to fetch some water with a gas can and a bunch of canteens from a creek at the foot of a hill, but the man was shot dead before he could get there. So we gave up trying to obtain water. Tormented by hunger, some soldiers devoured whatever they could lay their hands on. Men from southern China even ate toads and snakes. Many died because they had eaten poisonous mushrooms or a kind of wild onion that had forked leaves and that would blacken your lips a few moments after you swallowed it. Moans and curses rose from every direction. Dead men were scattered here and there like bundles of rags, some still holding a grass root or a tree leaf or a sprouting twig between their lips.
Toward evening we received two orders within the space of half an hour. The first one, as though our division were still intact, instructed our divisional staff together with two regiments to move west and occupy the mountain behind Maping Village; the other regiment was to go along a trail to Jiader Hill, which was opposite the mountain, facing the village, so that we could hit the enemy from both sides and cover the retreating field hospital charged with caring for thousands of wounded men. As soon as we received the order, our headquarters sent the 538th and 540th Regiments on their way to the village. But before the divisional staff could set out, another order arrived, calling for two of our regiments to march to Jiader Hill while the other one transported our division's hundreds of wounded men to Maping Village, then proceeded to occupy the mountain behind it. The higher-ups emphasized that our task was to cover the field hospital until they had brought back all the wounded, and that the 179th Division would cover our rear once we got there. By now one South Korean and two American divisions had caught up with us, and some of their units were encircling us from our right flank. Perplexed, Commissar Pei argued with Commander Niu over which order to follow. They both sat on boulders behind a huge rock, smoking Great Production cigarettes with dazed faces.
Pei stressed that from now on we should take into account the actual situation when we executed orders from above. There were new developments every hour, and our superiors were too far away to see what we were facing. The commissar said, pointing northwest, "The truth is that if we don't take that hill first, it'll be difficult for us to retreat."
"You should trust the leaders and our brother division," said Commander Niu.
"This is more than a matter of trust," Pei replied. "Our men's lives are at stake now."
"The telegram says clearly that the 179th Division is on the mountain and will cover our line of retreat."
"Well, we can't be sure of that."
"Rest assured, all right? We must follow the second order, which was meant to countermand the first one."
"But our division is already terribly understrength, down to a third of our normal capacity, no artillery, and almost out of ammunition. How can we possibly stop the enemy?"
"I'm aware of that, Old Pei, but as officers we have to obey orders."
That silenced the commissar. So without further delay messengers were sent out to catch up with the troops already on their way west and to deliver the new order which demanded that the 538th and 540th Regiments turn southwest and set up a defense line on Jiader Hill and that the 539th Regiment carry the wounded to Maping Village and then proceed to occupy the mountain behind it. Strange to say, a part of the order was altered in the process of delivery, and the whole 539th Regiment was dispatched to Eagle Peak, a hill almost eight miles to the northeast! They were ambushed by the Americans and got smashed.
Thus we lost the opportunity to seize the mountain behind Maping Village, which could have enabled us to retreat and save the remaining units. We had to trudge five extra miles of precipitous road to reach Jiader Hill, and this depleted our strength