Walk of Shame Read Online Free PDF

guidelines. You can
veto a suggestion. Or, I can help you push for something that will help you get
closer to the end we all want."
    "You're the
go-between."
    "Why, yes, I am," he
said with a smile. "But more than that, I'm here for you. I've never gone
through this, obviously. But I've watched more than a dozen others go through
this before you. I've seen it all. So I'm here to talk to, to lean on, to go
out and defend you, or explain your side. I can step in on your behalf. I'm
here to do whatever I have to, in order to keep your emotional war as painless
as possible. I'm here to protect everybody's interests in finding you a
mate."
    "Emotional war?"
    "Oh, Princess, you have no
idea what you're in for. I've seen guys walk away who would have won the girl's
heart, except he didn't feel that way for her. I've seen guys use the girl just
to get their fifteen minutes of fame. There's been guys who were turned away
and tried to come back and not take no for an answer. Then there's the pull of
the producers trying to tell you who to eliminate, who to keep, who to take on
what date, all in the interest of telling the story going on with the men in
the house. And the hair, makeup, and wardrobe departments will drive you loony.
Some nights we're filming all night, and then they want to start bugging you
just past dawn. You will be emotionally shot and physically exhausted by the
end."
    "Why did they hire you
instead of a female, if you're going to be acting on a female's behalf?"
    "Simple psychology. Guys
listen to other guys."
    I pointed to the containers on
the table. "Do you also determine what I eat?"
    He chuckled. "No. You never
have to eat what I bring you. But once we get going, it'll be a blessing for
you not to have to worry about cooking. And it's not all rabbit food. If you
have a request or a craving, just let me know. Although, keep in mind, I'm the
one that hears about it if your clothes start fitting too tight. You are always
welcome to cook for yourself, and keep whatever you want in the fridge in your
house. You can also make a grocery list to give to me. Your requests will
appear in your kitchen within hours."
    "Is someone going to write
my novels, articles, and blog entries, too?" I joked.
    "Uh, no. And I'm really
hoping you don't have very much of that to do while you're here."
    "No, I've gotten ahead on
all of that. I have plenty of writing banked. Though I'll probably still write.
It relaxes me during whatever downtime I get."
    "Okay, excellent. Because
what few spare moments you have, you won't want to spend working on anything stressful."
    "So, what's on today's
agenda?"
    "First off, we're going over
to the Hair and Makeup trailer for them to play around with your head and see
what styles they like on you and what they don't. Then it's over to the
Wardrobe trailer to make some final decisions on outfits. And I'm warning you
now, shorty, they have some five-inch heels over there they want to try to talk
you into wearing. And then I'll show you around the property and both your
house, and the men's house."
    Goldie ventured out of the bedroom
and I tossed her a piece of honeydew. She caught it in midair and swallowed it
down before coming over to check out Troy.
    "She's pretty laid back
about other people coming into the rig," he said.
    "Yeah, as long as my voice
is calm, she's calm. But if my tone changes and she thinks you're the cause,
she'll chase you out."
    Goldie finished her inspection
and then sat, staring at me.
    Ever the dutiful human, I tossed
her a piece of cantaloupe.
    "She likes fruit?" he
asked.
    "She likes whatever she can
get you to feed her off the table. I do stick ninety-five percent to dog food
for her. I just don't care for melons, except watermelon."
    "I'll make a note of
that."
    "So, at what point do I move
into the house?"
    "Set Design will have you
pick from a selection of linens, draperies, and accent colors today. It's their
way of letting you put your temporary mark on it so you can