Upstate Uproar Read Online Free PDF Page B

Just you wait!”
    Wendy rolled over and picked herself up off
the ground. “Totally worth it, I just wish I had video so I could
put it on ellentube. She’d totally run that on her show.”
    Lucy spoke up. “Holy crap, I would never
forgive you if Ellen DeGeneres ran a clip of that on her talk show.
I almost wet my pants back there.” She looked around and put her
hand on her hips. “How do we get out of here?”
    Kate turned around and started marching.
“Follow me! I have an excellent sense of direction. Plus, I smell
food.”
    They followed Kate’s nose through the maze,
laughing about aliens and crop circles, poking and prodding the
whole way. They emerged at the edge of the field, near the
makeshift parking lot.
    “Told ya I’d find the way,” Kate said as she
clicked off her flashlight. “My nose knows no bounds these
days.”
    They walked up to the house where Lucy headed
in to find a bathroom. A group had gathered on the front porch, the
front porch steps and in lawn chairs. A lady was selling food off
to the side, and Kate walked straight to her.
    “Hi, there! Whatcha got?”
    “Corn on the cob hot off the grill, smoked
turkey legs and pogos.”
    “What’s a pogo?”
    The lady held up a corn dog.
    “I’ll take a turkey leg, please,” Kate
said.
    The woman handed her a bigger-than-her-face
shank.
    Kate greedily took it and sank her teeth
in.
    Lucy walked up, licking her lips. “I’ll try a
pogo-slash-corny dog. Got mustard?”
    The woman reached into a vat of heat and
pulled out a foil-wrapped foot-long tube, then handed over two
mustard packets and looked at Vivian.
    “Corn on the cob for me,” Vivian said.
    The lady handed her a foil-wrapped, fatter,
shorter tube.
    Vivian looked at Wendy as she unwrapped her
cob and took a big-ass bite. “I can’t spend that much time lost in
corn and not make it pay!”
    Wendy pulled out some money and paid, then
the girls rocked on the porch while they ate. Kate was
super-impressed with her turkey leg and only pulled off a few
pieces to share.
    “I’m feeding two here,” she reminded, patting
her belly. “Save the best bites for Little Plum.”
    “Is it a girl?” Vivian asked. “Is that why
you call the baby ‘Little Plum’?”
    Kate licked her fingers. “The baby is the
size of a plum. That’s why I call her/him that. We had the
opportunity to find out, but we want it to be a surprise.”
    “It’s a girl, I just know it!” Vivian said as
she watched people wander into and out of the maze. She noticed
Brandon was sitting alone off to the side.
    A middle-aged man in jeans and a green
flannel shirt walked up to them. “So did you girls enjoy our
upstate New York’s finest maize maze?”
    “Our flashlight died,” Lucy said, finishing
off her pogo.
    “Yeah, that happens sometimes. Can sure mess
you up.” He sat down next to Wendy on the porch step. “So you have
plans tonight?”
    “Bed is my plan,” she said.
    “My kinda plan,” he said, and he put his arm
around her.
    She gently picked up his hand, lifted it over
her head and placed it on his knee. “I’m sleeping with preggo over
there, buddy. You’re outta luck.”
    He laughed. “Story of my life. Where are you
staying?”
    “Turlington Farms,” Vivian said.
    He gave a stern look. “Really? I didn’t know
that place was still open.”
    “It’s nice,” Wendy said. “Why wouldn’t it be
open?”
    “You know,” he said but didn’t elaborate
since Brandon walked up.
    “Hey, Gus, how are you?”
    “Doing fine,” the man said, standing. “You
enjoy your trip.”
    “Thanks,” they all chimed.
    “You ready to head back?” Brandon asked.
    Kate finished off her turkey leg and tossed
it in the trash from a distance of at least eight feet. “Our work
here is done.”
    They made it back to Turlington Farms, said
their goodnights to Brandon and got ready for bed.
    Vivian had to floss her teeth twice to
extract all the pesky corn kernels. She climbed into bed with