natural sound of lightning rolled through the sky. Something was knocking, and it would come for us whether we were ready or not.
Mister Misery
Do I dare to dream of the days before the outbreak? Can my reminiscence help me find peace even though my actions caused the deaths of millions of people? Will I ever find redemption?
I stood in that cold bathroom and repeatedly wiped the sweat from my brow. I looked into the mirror, and the person staring back was not the one I'd watched grow into a man. The arctic sapphire accusatory eyes gazed upon me as an unknown guilt crawled up my spine and tickled the nape of my neck with its steely claws.
I shivered, and quickly looked away as the clock struck noon on the last day of college—and as a matter of fact, the last day for humanity. I wondered how much longer it would be before those who wronged me paid for their poor choices.
Chad, my good friend and the man I fell in love with freshman year, plowed through the bathroom door. It clattered against the wall, and he stopped short of a foot from me. His exertion painted his cheeks rosy and white, and he breathed heavily as though the world was going to end.
He said through heaves of what sounded like thick viscous air, "You gotta hurry... the cafeteria... people are... dying."
I put my hand on his shoulder, and smiled thinly. I had expected more of a grin because I knew why they were dying, knew the reasons they perished that day, but the realization that I had murdered people had an unequivocally sobering effect.
“What are you talking about?” I said as I turned back to the sink. Although I had just washed my hands, I felt like I needed to wash them again. I’d played violent video games, enjoyed violent horror movies, and killed people in the visceral images painted by well-written horror novels. However, nothing prepared me for the real thing, the real emotions tied to ending someone’s life.
“People are dying, babe, do you get what I’m saying?”
I turned the water on, pumped three small piles of foamy soap into my palm, and as I washed my hands, I looked at the small box sitting on the counter next to me. Inside were the remnants of my dorm room. There were a few pencils, a lot of pens, a valentine’s card from Chad, and a comb. The comb wasn’t mine. My hair was as wild as crabgrass on a hillside. Chad, on the other hand, always had fantastic hair. Hell, he had many amazing features. Gorgeous brown eyes, thin powerful lips that stretched into a big beautiful smile, and the way his eyebrows lit up when he looked at me. I took a deep loving breath, and then shut off the water.
As I reached for a towel, Chad grabbed my arm, and he did it hard. I turned to him with surprise because he'd never been aggressive with me before.
He said, "Seriously, you need to listen to me. Everyone’s dyin ', man ... everyone. We gotta do something."
I honestly don’t know what happened, but suddenly things became real. My skin tensed with gooseflesh, and my face felt numb. Deep inside there was a feeling of guilt, the same feeling you get when you do something that you can’t take back. For some, it’s taking the extra change the cashier gave them or the feeling after being conned by a sleazeball . For me, it was the realization that what I had done began to kill more than just the people that hurt me.
“Come on, we gotta help them!” Chad said and grabbed my hand. He pulled me through the door and down the hall toward the campus cafeteria. At first, I resisted him. I didn’t want to see what I’d done. I couldn’t face the reality of my actions, and I knew I wouldn’t be able to hide what I’d done from Chad. He would know I was hiding something. He always did, just as he always managed to get me to do the things I didn’t want to do. Before I realized it, I was standing at the cafeteria doors. Ground zero.
I looked through the small crosshatched glass window of the door. Inside the large room