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seat for Oberon.
    My omelet looked scrumptious, and I promptly showered it with Tabasco to perfect it. Granuaile slathered her pancakes in butter and maple syrup and sighed appreciatively. For a while we did nothing but celebrate gluttony. After we’d tucked in long enough to take the edge off, I broached a subject that had been pestering me.
    » What I don’t understand, « I told Coyote, » is how you came up with this idea in the first place. This long-range planning, this sudden altruism—well, it doesn’t sound like your sort of enterprise, if you don’t mind me saying. «
    » Umf, « Coyote grunted around a mouthful of ham. He held up a finger, telling me to wait, there was more to come after he’d swallowed. After he gulped down the ham and chased it with a swig of coffee, he said, » Know what you mean, Mr. Druid. It’s a fair question. An’ it came about because I asked myself a differ’nt question, like why I’d never bothered to do somethin’ good for my people. «
    » Hold up, « I said. » What made you ask yourself that question? I mean, you’ve been around a long time, Coyote, and you could have asked yourself that centuries ago if it was in your nature. What changed your outlook? «
    » Oh. That. « He looked shamefaced and mumbled something about oompa loompas.
    » Pardon me? « I asked.
    » I said Oprah Winfrey , « Coyote growled, his irritation clear. Granuaile’s jaw dropped, and Coyote pointed a finger at her. » Not a word outta you, Miss Druid. « She wisely took a large bite of her pancakes and chewed as if he’d been discussing nothing more than the nice weather outside.
    › It’s okay, Coyote, I secretly find her inspirational as well, ‹ Oberon chimed in. › It’s a shame she’s no longer on the air. I had a dream once where I was in a studio audience full of famous dogs—I was sitting right next to Rin Tin Tin—and she gave all of us our very own cow. » You get a cow, and you get a cow, everyone gets a cow! « And then, to make it sweeter, she gave everybody their own Iron Chef to cook it up. I scored Bobby Flay, and Rin Tin Tin got Cat Cora. The Tramp got Morimoto but he was pissed because he wanted Mario Batali, and I was like, » Tramp, you got a free cow , dawg, you have absolutely nothing to bitch about here, « and he was all, » Look, Oberon, I’ve moved up in the world. I’ve sold a shitload of DVDs and I’ve single-handedly made mutts adorable, so I’m not going to settle for a guy who specializes in fish. I want an Italian who knows his way around a rack of ribs. « Can you believe that guy? Total diva. ‹
    Coyote and I chuckled over this, and Granuaile knew Oberon had said something amusing, but she refrained from asking what it was. She was still trying to keep her amusement over the Oprah revelation from showing on her face.
    Sensing this, perhaps seeing the flicker of a smile at the corners of Granuaile’s mouth, Coyote chose to move on. » Look, Mr. Druid. A long time ago, I fucked things up for people. Brought death to the world, you know, made it permanent. It’s tough to live that down. I’ve always done things to satisfy my own hungers; seems like I’m always hungry, « he said, gesturing to the stack of empty plates in front of him. He paused as the waitress arrived with his four additional orders of sausage and cleared away his dishes. Then he continued, » But I see now there are other hungers than mine to feed. An’ I want to do somethin’ about it. I want to do somethin’ that is one-hunnert percent good. People will look an’ say, where’s the downside? What trick is Coyote playin’ now? But there won’t be any. An’ that’ll be my finest trick of all. «
    Coyote ate his sausage even faster than before, then got up to go to the bathroom and didn’t come back. That meant I got stuck with the bill; I should have seen that one coming. The trickster was waiting for us out in the parking lot with a grin on his face.
    » Took you long