The Waiting Game Read Online Free PDF Page B

fat bastard won’t leave me alone. The old man’s fault. The Meat’s biggest fan. Back to Hell was the soundtrack to my life. Christ.
    But I won’t do that.
    What wouldn’t you do, Meat? Me, there’s nothing I wouldn’t do.
    She was distracted last night. Easy to hate her when she’s like that. Not that I could ever hate her. Wish sometimes it could be easier, more straightforward. The way these things are meant to be. Wish she didn’t have to be so complicated.
    She can’t help it. I know that.
    Run right into hell and back.
    In the blink of an eye.
    It’s like she doesn’t want me to know what she’s thinking. Like she’s hiding the best part of herself. She’s scared. I understand that. Understand why, as well. We have more in common than she knows. I want to tell her that, just don’t know how to do it.
    She let me touch her last night. Would have let me do more, too. I felt her skin when I put my hand inside her shirt. The shock of it. Electricity through my body. Shock after shock. Her face close to mine, smiling, letting me know she felt it too.
    Exquisite pain. Knowing what I wanted but holding myself back. Making sure to take it slowly. Don’t want to scare her off.
    You can go your whole life not knowing. I nearly did. If our paths hadn’t crossed, maybe I’d have gone on like that. Now I know, though. And that changes everything.
    * * *
    ‘I suppose I should congratulate you,’ Ellen said.
    ‘Only if you want to.’ Ger smiled. ‘I can understand if this might be a bit awkward for you. Which is why I wanted to see you. I was hoping we could talk things through, iron out any potential issues before they become a problem.’
    They were sitting in Ger’s office. What used to be Ed Baxter’s office until Ed left on long-term sick leave. So far, Ger hadn’t added any personal touches and the room was almost exactly as Ed had left it. The only thing missing was the framed photo he’d kept on his desk. Ed and his missus on holiday in Costa delSomewhere or Other.
    ‘Can’t stand clutter,’ Ger explained. ‘Lucky for me, Ed was the same. Nothing worse than spending your first day in a new job clearing up someone else’s crap. Coffee?’
    She swung off her chair and went to the Nespresso machine on the shelf behind her desk. The coffee machine the team had bought Ed as a fiftieth birthday present.
    ‘He left this for me,’ Ger said. ‘Told me it belonged here, not at home with him. Truth is, Ellen, I think the chemo’s left him feeling so bloody sick he can’t stomach anything right now.’
    ‘You’ve been in touch then?’ Ellen asked.
    ‘Of course,’ Ger said. ‘Haven’t you?’
    Not as much as she should have. Hardly at all, in fact. Her last few weeks working with Ed hadn’t been easy. He’d done something she hadn’t agreed with and she was finding it hard to forgive him. She knew she should put aside whatever issues she had and make the most of the little time he had left, but she was finding that hard to do. At one stage, she’d considered him a close friend. Not anymore, though, and that hurt. Because she felt that way, she’d chosen to put distance between them. A distance that, in all likelihood, probably caused her more pain than it did him.
    ‘I see him a bit,’ she lied. ‘But you know how it is. Family, work…’
    The excuse sounded pathetic and she trailed off, unable to finish, unable to look Ger Cox in the eye as she handed Ellen a bright yellow mug.
    ‘Milk?’
    Ellen shook her head. ‘Black, no sugar. This is perfect. Thanks.’
    ‘I’ve gone through the current caseload,’ Ger said. ‘I think I’m pretty much up to speed with your team’s priorities. Biggest case at the moment is this double murder on Loampit Vale?’
    ‘Right.’
    ‘You’ve made an arrest?’
    Ellen nodded. ‘Charged him an hour ago. He’s being held over tonight and we’re at the Mag’s Court first thing tomorrow.’
    ‘Excellent,’ Ger said. ‘And what about this?’