The Valiant Women Read Online Free PDF Page B

against him, he rocked her as he might a child till stiffness ebbed from her and she clung to him, weeping in a hopeless way that stirred him to the depths, made him ache to protect her, though there was that other almost overwhelming urge in him, too, to kiss that sweet mouth, know the soft breasts and thighs, lose himself utterly in possessing her.
    â€œWhat is it?” he soothed, stroking her hair. “What is it, little one? Are you sure you don’t want to go to your cousin?”
    â€œNot now .”
    â€œBut if he loves you—”
    She laughed bitterly. “How can he? We’ve never seen each other. It was a thing arranged.” Straightening, she said in a matter-of-fact way, “Even if I loved him, it would be impossible. To him. I am damaged, ruined.”
    â€œDon’t say that!” So it was true. The Areneños had raped her.
    â€œMaybe I am ruined—not the way he’d mean but in a worse one. Shea!” She struck at him with her fist, not really at him, but at her devils. “Shea, what can I do?”
    â€œWhy, sure, chiquita , you’ll be doing whatever you want if it’s possible or I can make it that way.”
    â€œIt’s stupid, what I want. And it—it’s not fair.”
    â€œNever mind. What is it?”
    She buried her face against him. “Shea, I want to stay with you but—” He could scarcely make out the despairing cry. “I have fear! I have much fear!”
    Joyful relief weakened him. She cared about him, then! He was no green boy, to rush or hurt or disgust her. He knew the wounds of the spirit healed more slowly than those of the body, but with time and patience …
    He laughed exultantly, kissed where the hair swirled back from her forehead. “Now if that’s all your worry, you’re God’s lucky lass! I’d rather have you with me than all the hosts of heaven and may I be damned to the blackest hell before I hurt you!”
    â€œBut—you’re a man!”
    â€œTo be sure.” He wiped her eyes with her rebozo, brought up her face and grinned till, shyly, she smiled back. “Before we’re through, it’s my hope to make you mightily glad of that! But there’s more to a man than desire, chiquita . Much more to loving.”
    She trusted him, that was the hell of it. Once she had his assurance, she seemed to think it was straight and easy, that he didn’t have to battle himself. Instead of shrinking from his touch, she sought it, lay in his arms till he started to tremble with suppressed longing.
    How could she press against him like that, only the torn dress between her body and his, if she really didn’t want the passion and strength and tenderness he burned to envelop her in till they were utterly joined, completely each other’s?
    Take her! Take her! Why fool around with what must be? Later she’d be glad .…
    Was that how he’d repay her for saving his life? Force her as those killers of her father had?
    Shea put her from him. “It’s time we slept, lass. Tomorrow I’ll try for a deer, and you get all the beans you can. We need to be moving out. Those Areneños are bound to turn up soon or late.”
    â€œYes, Shea.” She curled up beside him, so close he felt the warmth of her, smelled the musky yucca root with which she washed herself.
    She was asleep at once, trustfully, as if all her troubles were over. But Shea had a feeling his were just starting.
    He didn’t think he could sneak up on a deer and kill it with a knife so he decided to dig a hole in the sand at the bottom of the trail, covering it with twigs and leaves disguised by sand and small rocks.
    The trap would bear the weight of small creatures. Anything heavy enough to break through should supply the meat they needed for the walk out of this place that looked like the dregs of God’s wrath when He was too sick of what He’d made to finish