The Romantic Adventures of Mr. Darby and of Sarah His Wife Read Online Free PDF Page B

scowl and then, clasping his hands upon his waistcoat, began as slowly as George Stedman:
    â€˜Ladies and Gentlemen. On behalf of myself and my wife I thank you all. I am
sensible,
deeply
sensible?
—he paused, assailed by a sudden horrible doubt about the word
sensible.
When he had heard himself repeat it for the second time it had seemed to him, in this connection, to be perfect nonsense. But a rapid glance round the table reassured him. If he was talking nonsense, no one had noticed it. ‘… sensible,’ he continued, ‘of the
sincerity,
and the … ah …
cordiality
of the congratulations which our friend Mr. Stedman here … ‘Mr. Darby unclasped his hands, neatly indicated George Stedman with an open palm, and reclasped them … ‘has … ah …voiced for you with his customary eloquence. It is a solemn moment, Ladies and Gentlemen—our friend Mr. Stedman has experienced it and will corrod … corrog … corrobulate me … when a man joins the ranks of the kinka … quinco … twinka … ‘Mr. Darby hesitated and, dropping his eyes, accidentally smiled a little weakly at Mrs. Cribb.
    Mrs. Cribb thought the smile intentional, and giggled in response. ‘The kinkajous, Mr. Darby?’ she suggested brightly.
    This unpardonable frivolity gave Mr. Darby the necessarystimulus. He pulled himself sternly together and raised his chin: ‘… of the quinquagenians,’ he said with great seriousness.
    He had equipped himself with several other imposing words to adorn the occasion, but now wisely determined to discard them in favour of more managable vocables. For Mr. Darby had now realized his present limitations: he had discovered what orders he could expect his rallied mutineers to obey, what would be bungled or ignored, and like a wise general he tempered his commands to the condition of his troops. Thenceforward things went without a hitch. He swung his listeners to heights undreamt of by George Stedman, held them there on pinnacles of an almost unearthly eloquence; then plunged them suddenly into dramatic silences, from which, when all hope seemed lost, he calmly rescued them and set them down on the comfortable levels of the commonplace. He was now perfectly at his ease, fully master of himself. He felt that he could easily go on speaking for half the night. But when he had been at it for a quarter of an hour he happened to notice that Sarah’s eye was upon him. He tried to avoid it, but it held him and for a moment his eloquence flagged. He floundered, but instantly recovered himself. But perhaps she was right: the best of things must end. He threw out his chest and raised his chin. ‘In a word, my friends,’ he concluded, enveloping the company in a gaze which was moist and glittering with emotion, while with a fine forensic skill he began gradually to diminish his speed and the volume of his tone, ‘In a word, I thank you,
we
thank you, both for your good
wishes,
and for the
great privilege
you have
given
us in
allowing
us … to
entertain
you
here … to-night.’
    With the ponderous slowness of one who sways empires, Mr. Darby resumed his seat.

Chapter III

The Morning After The Night Before
    Mr. Darby woke during the small hours feeling strangely ill at ease. Where was he? What was happening? Evidently he was at sea and it was blowing up for rough weather, for now he fell through fathoms of vacuity, now his bed thrust him up, up, upwards till it seemed that he would certainly bump the top of created things. Could it be that he had taken the plunge and was actually now following in the wake of Uncle Tom Darby? He opened his eyes and the ship suddenly and distressingly stood still. Oof! Opposite him shone the faint livid glare, so unmistakably familiar, of the street lamp outside the back door shining through the dark blue bedroom blind. He must be at home. Cautiously he reached out a foot. Yes, there was