resin from the terebinth tree to relax the skin so that they can be easily fattened up again. Or they will apply depilatories made of blood, gall and tuna liver to remove adolescent males’ hair and make them look younger. Or they mix root of hyacinth with sweet wine and feed it to adolescents to slow the signs of puberty and the onset of sexual development. Other frauds include using dye to add colour to the pale cheeks of an ailing slave, or dressing them with finery to cover barely healed old wounds and scars.
Ask questions. Do not take anything the dealer says at face value. Quiz him about the slave’s character. If the slave is female make sure he declares whether she is incapable of bearing children. Find out if she has ever given birth to stillborn infants, or whether she menstruates regularly. Discover whether the slave has ever committed a capital offence, tried to run away, or been condemned to fight the beasts in the arena. All of these facts display the sort of character that you could well do without in your household. Beware the clever slave, unless you are looking to train them as a letter-writer or reader. For the clever slave is a troublesome slave in any other position. But enquire also about moral defects: does the slave have a gambling habit, is he prone to drink too much if given the opportunity, does he prefer the company of other male slaves?
Avoid slaves who appear melancholy. Being a slave is hardly the most enviable job and those with a depressive disposition will find it turns their mood black. Indeed, it is one of the bugbears of slave-ownership that we have to rely on individuals who frequently break down in tears or even attempt suicide. The law states that sellers are obliged to reveal to prospective buyers if a slave has tried to kill himself but we cannot always be sure that the truth is being told so would do well to trust our instincts. This is a more common problem than you might realise. For, as the proverbs say, ‘It is beautiful to die instead of being degraded as a slave’; and ‘If you don’t like being a slave, you will be miserable; but you won’t stop being a slave.’
Once you have carefully selected your slave and agreed a price, make sure you get a contract. In accordance with our contract law, the vendor should put up a guarantor to stand surety for him should the buyer be dissatisfied in some justifiable way. The contract will state your name and position, the name of the slave, or any other name he may have, his race, the price, the name of the vendor, the name of his guarantor, the date, and the place where the contract has been drawn up. Note that in the purchase of slaves, it is customary for the slave’s own possessions, including any money he has managed to save, to go with the slave, unless it is expressly stated otherwise.
Make sure you have a written guarantee from the dealer as to the slave’s healthiness. Be sure to understand what the guarantee is protection against: matters such as disease, a tendency to run away and gambling habitsmust be declared; defects such as laziness and having bad breath need not be. It is not always clear what healthy means. Is a slave whose tongue has been cut out healthy? In fact there are as many possible minor defects in slaves as there are slaves. I’ve had them all: bed-wetters, epileptics, missing toes, stammerers, thieves. We all know what a bad slave is: he is fickle, lazy, slow, late, greedy, obstinate, ugly, pot-bellied and squint-eyed, he slouches and shrugs his shoulders as he speaks. By contrast we all know what a good slave is: loyal, hard-working and vigilant. The problem is that it is often very difficult to tell them apart when they have been brushed up by the slave dealers.
Once purchased you will also have to consider what work you are going to put your slave to doing. There is a multitude of possible tasks that can await him. Slaves divide broadly into two types: rural and urban. Those employed in the