shouldn’t. Everyone whispered things like that behind my back. I was the biggest snob, the girl who wanted nothing to do with people she thought were beneath her, which meant everyone , according to my peers.
But ugly? I mean, I’d never thought I was some drop-dead gorgeous stunner or anything, but ugly? And he’d said it without any hesitancy, with such conviction that it made it feel like well-known truth.
I know Kai and I didn’t speak. But I thought he of all people would know what I was going through. It would make sense to him, if to no one else.
Clearly, I’d been wrong. Really, stupidly wrong.
I pulled my hair from its ponytail and ran my fingers through the front pieces so they didn’t tuck behind my ears and fell firmly into my face. With my books clutched in front of me, shielding as much of my face as possible, my eyes panned to the path at my feet, I found Jeremy, and went home.
Kai’s words echoed in my head. Not that she has a reason to be a snob. All you have to do is look at her face to see that.
And as any girl would do, I looked to my mother for affirmation that I didn’t deserve those words. That I was worth more than that, that my exterior appearance didn’t define me.
“Lily, what happened to you?” my mother paraded toward me as I entered her wing of the house. Her fingers danced across her ear as she secured the back of her earring. Then she began running her fingers through my hair and pulled it back into its slick ponytail. “Your face is a mess. Have you been crying?” she sighed. “Maybe we should leave it down then. I can have Meredith come up to give you a hand with the styling.”
More tears stung my eyes. But I strangled them back.
“Don’t purse your lips like that,” she tapped them. “You’ll get premature wrinkles. You need to clean up. We don’t have that much time. You know it’s a big day for your father. He’s talking to Jet and his PR team now to go over the plan for tonight. Did they show the announcement at school?”
I nodded stiffly.
“Good,” and now she added a hint of glee in her eyes. “It’s all going so well. We just have the dinner tonight. You just have to get through the Congressional dinner. Put your dress on and a smile. You don’t have to do anything else. You’re father and I will handle the press. Maybe say hello to Kai. He’ll be joining Roderick this evening. It would look nice for the campaign if you two were friendly.”
I couldn’t speak without letting free the flood of tears.
My mother paused only then to look at my face. She didn’t need to voice the disappointment I saw there. “What am I going to do with you?”
It was then I realized no one was going to comfort me. There weren’t going to be warm embraces and soothing words anywhere in my future. Only hard interiors and forced smiles. So I conformed. Became the statue everyone expected. Faked grins and donned pretty dresses.
After that day, I wore my hair down and my head low. I waited out the days until Kai turned eighteen, which was only a few weeks after I overheard him talking. Then he was pulled from school and kept indoors.
He survived his eighteenth year without being taken and joined the military on his nineteenth birthday. I’m sure it was his father’s idea. It would look great for his father’s campaign to have two military heroes in the family. And Kai was destined to be a military hero, with all his charisma and charm.
My mother pulls the newspaper from her face. She insists on having paper copies hand-delivered each morning, even though everything is available online now.
Her face is placid and she nods, “That will do.” She waves the seamstress away with one hand. My garment is complete.
“I see Kai’s home from the military,” I tip my chin at the front page.
My mother glances down at it like she hadn’t even noticed his picture. “Yes, well, apparently he’s on leave for a while to help his father with the campaign. Not sure
But ugly? I mean, I’d never thought I was some drop-dead gorgeous stunner or anything, but ugly? And he’d said it without any hesitancy, with such conviction that it made it feel like well-known truth.
I know Kai and I didn’t speak. But I thought he of all people would know what I was going through. It would make sense to him, if to no one else.
Clearly, I’d been wrong. Really, stupidly wrong.
I pulled my hair from its ponytail and ran my fingers through the front pieces so they didn’t tuck behind my ears and fell firmly into my face. With my books clutched in front of me, shielding as much of my face as possible, my eyes panned to the path at my feet, I found Jeremy, and went home.
Kai’s words echoed in my head. Not that she has a reason to be a snob. All you have to do is look at her face to see that.
And as any girl would do, I looked to my mother for affirmation that I didn’t deserve those words. That I was worth more than that, that my exterior appearance didn’t define me.
“Lily, what happened to you?” my mother paraded toward me as I entered her wing of the house. Her fingers danced across her ear as she secured the back of her earring. Then she began running her fingers through my hair and pulled it back into its slick ponytail. “Your face is a mess. Have you been crying?” she sighed. “Maybe we should leave it down then. I can have Meredith come up to give you a hand with the styling.”
More tears stung my eyes. But I strangled them back.
“Don’t purse your lips like that,” she tapped them. “You’ll get premature wrinkles. You need to clean up. We don’t have that much time. You know it’s a big day for your father. He’s talking to Jet and his PR team now to go over the plan for tonight. Did they show the announcement at school?”
I nodded stiffly.
“Good,” and now she added a hint of glee in her eyes. “It’s all going so well. We just have the dinner tonight. You just have to get through the Congressional dinner. Put your dress on and a smile. You don’t have to do anything else. You’re father and I will handle the press. Maybe say hello to Kai. He’ll be joining Roderick this evening. It would look nice for the campaign if you two were friendly.”
I couldn’t speak without letting free the flood of tears.
My mother paused only then to look at my face. She didn’t need to voice the disappointment I saw there. “What am I going to do with you?”
It was then I realized no one was going to comfort me. There weren’t going to be warm embraces and soothing words anywhere in my future. Only hard interiors and forced smiles. So I conformed. Became the statue everyone expected. Faked grins and donned pretty dresses.
After that day, I wore my hair down and my head low. I waited out the days until Kai turned eighteen, which was only a few weeks after I overheard him talking. Then he was pulled from school and kept indoors.
He survived his eighteenth year without being taken and joined the military on his nineteenth birthday. I’m sure it was his father’s idea. It would look great for his father’s campaign to have two military heroes in the family. And Kai was destined to be a military hero, with all his charisma and charm.
My mother pulls the newspaper from her face. She insists on having paper copies hand-delivered each morning, even though everything is available online now.
Her face is placid and she nods, “That will do.” She waves the seamstress away with one hand. My garment is complete.
“I see Kai’s home from the military,” I tip my chin at the front page.
My mother glances down at it like she hadn’t even noticed his picture. “Yes, well, apparently he’s on leave for a while to help his father with the campaign. Not sure
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