The Promises We Keep (Made for Love Book 1) Read Online Free PDF Page B

For a while now, time has been on my side. We could talk about the future and it was so far away that it was simply that — the future . I didn ’ t have to act on my promises just yet and that was okay, so long as I meant them. And I did — I do . I mean them. Looking down at my girl, I know that she ’ s the only woman that I want. I know that I want to marry her. All the conversations we ’ ve had about spending our lives together were genuine. But now that the future is all too quickly morphing into the present , I can ’ t help but feel a bit anxious.
    Right now, I like the idea of the future being in the distance. I ’ m not ready for it to be here . I don ’ t know the first thing about being a husband. Yes, I ’ ve got a dad who has loved my mom for over twenty years, but his ability to keep his marriage together isn ’ t exactly something he can pass down to me. Sure, the Bible outlines the role of husband pretty specifically, but God ’ s commandments aren ’ t that easy. If they were, everyone would follow them all the time. But that ’ s not how it works and we aren ’ t perfect. Thank God perfection is not mandatory, because I ’ m so far from it. But, more importantly, I ’ m not ready to get married! And that truth scares me more than the future.
    I can ’ t tell Addie this. I can ’ t. She wouldn ’ t understand. The last thing I want her to believe is that I don ’ t want her — because that ’ s not it. I don ’ t know how to say what I ’ m feeling while at the same time guaranteeing that she knows that she shouldn ’ t be insecure about my insecurities. Is that even possible?
    “ Beckham, ” she whispers. The gentle way that she calls my name pulls me from my thoughts and I see that her eyes are pooling with tears. My heart rate speeds up. I hate that my hesitation is causing her pain.
    I cup my hands around her cheeks and step closer to her, eliminating even the slightest bit of space between us. “ Addison Jane — I love you so much. Right now, right here, in this moment, I don ’ t have answers to your questions. That doesn ’ t mean anything, though. It doesn ’ t change anything. I love you. I want you. You . Always. Okay? ”
    She nods, the act causing a couple tears to spill from her eyes. I wipe them away with the pads of my thumbs before leaning down to press my lips against hers. I kiss her hard, needing her to know that I mean what I said — that I love her with all of my heart. She reciprocates my affection and my nerves relax, my fear and anxiety deflating as I hold onto this kiss. When I open my mouth to kiss her deeper, she does the same, her hands finding their way to my waist. It isn ’ t until we hear a wolf whistle from a passerby that we pull away from each other. When we do, I pay the pedestrian no mind, but align my gaze with hers.
    “ Are you okay? ” She nods and offers me a small smile. I search her big brown eyes, seeking her genuine assurance that she ’ s with me, that she trusts me. “ I love you, ” I murmur.
    “ I love you, too. ”
    “ I don ’ t want you to worry, alright? ” She nods once more.
    I don ’ t tell her that I ’ m already worried enough for the both of us.

    Since Avery and I both wanted to do a little studying before our movie night, I invite her over to work at my place, bribing her with grilled cheese sandwiches for lunch. Not that I really had to convince her. We might not be dating, but we do enjoy each others company quite a bit.
    As soon as Beck drops us off, she walks with Sarah back to their apartment to grab her things while I hurry back to my place to get lunch started. I kick my shoes off at the door, like we always do, and pad my way to the kitchen. I ’ m pulling out bread, cheese, and butter when I hear Jackson ’ s bedroom door open. I look up to find Claire quietly making her exit.
    She ’ s being swallowed by one of Jack ’ s t-shirts and I can barely make out the hem of the tiny sleeping shorts