the silver seashell barrette, the one she'd first worn when she arrived in Westchester, and fastened her lopsided bangs to the side of her head. Then she took a deep breath and powered up her computer. At the top of the page she typed,
Miss Understood.
After that the words flowed out of her like tears.
MISS UNDERSTOOD
by Claire Lyons
You used to send me e-mails
And gummy worms galore.
I stopped biting my nails
Because I wasn't lonely anymore.
I'd stare into your eyes,
One green and one blue;
We'd share a plate of fries
And I'd dream of kissing you.
But Cam, you broke my heart like glass,
And all because of Nina Call-as.
You acted like we were through,
And so J.H. I had to choose.
I never liked him as more than a friend;
I was hurt because I got dissed.
Please don't say that this is the end:
I won't be happy till we've kissed.
And without reading it over, Claire hit send. Because that's what desperate people do.
OCTAVIAN COUNTRY DAY SCHOOL THE SERENITY CHAPEL
Friday, February 20th 3:50 P.M.
If Massie had known she'd be crouching in the balcony of the Serenity Chapel, spying on Dylan and Alicia after school, she never would have worn her denim Chip & Pepper miniskirt.
If they'd happened to look up, they would have caught their newly appointed kissing guru squatting like a frog, making little effort to conceal her turquoise Cosabella thong underwear.
Massie prayed to Gawd that Principal Burns would burst through the heavy oak doors and bust her friends for sneaking into the forbidden chapel after school. That was plan A and her only way out. If the girls got caught, they'd immediately get kicked out of the chapel and sent home for the rest of the day. Then the kissing lesson would be canceled and Massie would have more time to build up the courage to truly kiss Derrington and get some real experience. Because now all she had to share with her disciples were a few makeshift props and a big load of crap.
Livvy Collins, Alexandra Regan, and Carrie Randolph tiptoed across the royal blue carpet and disappeared into the choir pit below the pulpit where Dylan and Alicia were hiding. The sounds of giggling followed by loud
shhhh's
rose up to the balcony every time another girl stepped down into the pit, filling Massie with nervous desperation. She had deployed hundreds of insane tactics to maintain her queen bee status, but this one was the most ridiculous. Not only was she claiming to be an expert on something she knew nothing about, she was flat-out lying to Kristen, Alicia, and Dylan. And that took social warfare to new heights.
Massie would give Principal Burns five more minutes to shut down the party and if she didn't, Massie would have to give her public what they'd come for.
Claire and her ahn-noying activist friend Layne came in next. They weren't giddy like the other girls. They weren't whispering or giggling. Instead, Claire was chewing her thumbnail and Layne was shaking her head back and forth like she was way too mature to be there. For a split second, Massie wondered if Claire had told Layne the truth; that the kissing clinic was a ploy for Massie to get her credibility back after Nina had hijacked it. But she immediately shook the idea from her head. Claire knew better than to betray Massie's confidence. Besides, Massie knew Claire's secret about kissing Josh Hotz. All she had to do was leak that to Alicia and Claire would be reduced to LBR (loser beyond repair) status all over again. Alicia would make sure of it.
Massie inched a little closer to the edge of the balcony to see if Claire's bangs had been able to work through some of their problems since lunch, but no such luck. They were still short and crooked. Jakkob would have to be notified over the weekend. The newest member of the Pretty Committee could
not
go on the Lake Placid trip looking like the Bride of Chucky. It would reflect poorly on all of them.
Kristen shuffled in a few steps behind Claire and Layne, carrying the Sony mini DV