survive by relying on his own skill.
Aaron stepped forward and tapped an old black and white photo. “That's Pop, Noni's husband, in front of his F4U Corsair in WWII. He flew over one hundred missions and still made it home to her.” Aaron pointed to the next photo, a soldier in solid green, framed by jungle. “That's Dad when he was in Vietnam. And then that handsome strapping man in the next picture is me. I tell you, they should have put me on the cover of Military Magazine.”
Ethan snorted. “Yeah, I think you may be waiting a long time on that call.”
Aaron continued, completely unfazed. “That is from about twenty years ago, when we were all young. The last picture we have of Noni and Pop together with all the grandkids.”
A younger Noni and Aaron’s grandfather sat on chairs in the yard, children in their laps, standing beside them, on the ground sitting in front. Ethan rubbed the dull ache in his chest. He'd never have that, wasn't meant to. He'd resigned himself to the life of a nomad years ago and knew he'd walk this earth alone.
So why did his damn heart feel like Aaron had just hollowed it out with a dull spoon?
“Got to hit the head. I'll be back in a few minutes and show you to your room. You can just chill here.” Aaron nodded and strode past Ethan down a long hallway off to the right of the living room.
Ethan stared at that last picture, the one of the couple obviously in love surrounded by their offspring, but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't place himself there. That life wasn't for him. He knew exactly how his own life would play out. He'd stay in the Special Forces until he was either too injured to stay active or he'd die on a mission. He told himself that was his only choice. Besides, he didn’t know how to live any differently.
The picture of Pop in front of the fighter plane, that he could put himself in easily. Ethan sensed a presence and glanced down at Noni, her weathered gaze fixed with longing on that photo.
“They called him the Eagle. He flew on more missions in that one tour of duty than most men do in an entire lifetime. He said he couldn't stand staying on the ground and leaving his men unprotected.” She sniffed and traced a bony finger over her husband’s face.
The dull ache in Ethan's chest grew. No one would ever stare at his photo with longing.
“When they recruited him for the Kamikaze Brigade, I cried for a month straight. Out of the fifty volunteers who flew into the heart of Germany, only my husband and two others survived.”
“I learned about the Kamikazes in Air Born School. They were hands down the most famous and badass pilots in history.” He didn't tell her the part about the survivors being rumored as mad men. They'd had a mortality rate of over ninety percent, making them not only the most famous, but the deadliest.
But the proud grin and glint in Pop's eye was the same wild look Ethan saw every time he looked into a mirror. “No offense, ma'am, but why did he settle down? I mean, that kind of adrenaline rush...” was for legends.
Not fathers and husbands.
“You know Johnny always told me he planned to die in the war. Didn't think he’d live to see his twenty-fifth birthday, but he had something to live for. Me. I never understood and never tried to really figure him out. I never asked him to give up the service either if that's what you're thinking. After Aaron's father was born I asked Johnny why he'd chosen me and he said, ‘When I saw you, I knew. I knew the rush of being a fighter pilot could never measure up to holding the love