worthy squire! He who stands before you is a vagabond!â
The Chief Elder inspected Bubach Angh with puzzlement. âFor a fact you resemble that peasant who for thirty-one years has carted supplies to Smolod. But if you are Bubach Angh, who is this?â
The beardless peasant lumbered forward. âIt is the soulless wretch who stole the clothes from my back and the beard from my face.â
âHe is a criminal, a bandit, a vagabond ââ
âHold!â called the Chief Elder. âThe words are ill-chosen. Remember that he has been exalted to the rank of prince of Smolod.â
âNot altogether!â cried Bubach Angh. âHe has one of my eyes. I demand the other!â
âAn awkward situation,â muttered the Chief Elder. He spoke to Cugel: âThough formerly a vagabond and cutthroat, you are now a prince, and a man of responsibility. What is your opinion?â
âI suggest a hiding for these obstreperous louts. Then ââ
Bubach Angh and the beardless peasant, uttering shouts of rage, sprang forward. Cugel, leaping away, could not control his right eye. The lid flew open; into his brain crashed such a wonder of exaltation that his breath caught in his throat and his heart almost stopped from astonishment. But concurrently his left eye showed the reality of Smolod, the dissonance was too wild to be tolerated; he stumbled and fell against a hut. Bubach Angh stood over him with mattock raised high, but now the Chief Elder stepped between.
âDo you take leave of your senses? This man is a prince of Smolod!â
âA man I will kill, for he has my eye! Do I toil thirty-one years for the benefit of a vagabond?â
âCalm yourself, Bubach Angh, if that be your name, and remember the issue is not yet entirely clear. Possibly an error has been made â undoubtedly an honest error, for this man is now a prince of Smolod, which is to say, justice and sagacity personified.â
âHe was not that before he received the cusp,â argued Bubach Angh, âwhich is when the offense was committed.â
âI cannot occupy myself with casuistic distinctions,â replied the elder. âIn any event, your name heads the list and on the next fatality ââ
âTen or twelve years hence?â cried Bubach Angh. âMust I toil yet longer, and receive my reward just as the sun goes dark? No, no, this cannot be!â
The beardless peasant made a suggestion: âTake the other cusp. In this way you will have at least half of your rights, and so prevent the interloper from cheating you totally.â
Bubach Angh agreed. âI will start with my one magic cusp; I will then kill that knave and take the other, and all will be well.â
âNow then,â said the Chief Elder haughtily, âthis is hardly the tone to take in reference to a prince of Smolod!â
âBah!â snorted Bubach Angh. âRemember the source of your viands! We of Grodz will not toil to no avail.â
âVery well,â said the Chief Elder. âI deplore your uncouth bluster, but I cannot deny that you have a measure of reason on your side. Here is the left cusp of Radkuth Vomin. I will dispense with the invocation, anointment and the congratulatory paean. If you will be good enough to step forward and open your left eye â so.â
As Cugel had done, Bubach Angh looked through both eyes together and staggered back in a daze. But clapping his hand to his left eye he recovered himself, and advanced upon Cugel. âYou now must see the futility of your trick. Extend me that cusp and go your way, for you will never have the use of the two.â
âIt matters very little,â said Cugel. âThanks to my friend Firx I am well content with the one.â
Bubach Angh ground his teeth. âDo you think to trick me again? Your life has approached its end: not just I but all Grodz goes warrant for this!â
âNot
Brian Herbert, Kevin J. Anderson