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Death; Grief; Bereavement,
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Dead
the groom’s brother instead? I mean, he is, like, thirty, so no attraction there, right? And he’d probably have pretended not to notice that I was a complete klutz.
To make it all worse, a few days ago Gabriel broke up with his girlfriend, Dana (who’d been his girlfriend for, like, two years ). I haven’t been able to stop thinking about that all day long. It’s the kind of thing that, you know, gives a girl a glimmer of hope—as if I had a chance with a guy as hot as Gabe Archer.
Sandra’s always telling me that I’m prettier than I think I am—that my freckles are cute and that my brown hair has just the right red highlights, but she’s my best friend, so she has to say stuff like that. It’s not as if a few halfway decent features will attract a guy who has absolutely everything going for him. He’s friendly, smart, and has these wide, wide shoulders that fill out his tux perfectly….
I’ve been tormenting myself with thoughts like this all day. My mom hasn’t made getting Gabe off my mind any easier, either. She’s reminded me—like, seven times—about the crush I had on Gabe back when I was in sixth grade.
Back then, every girl crushed on Gabe. He had thisbutter-blond hair that curled into perfect ringlets. He was shorter than I was, but I had dreams of him shooting past me in height. My mother laughed the first time she saw him and figured out how I felt about him.
But she’s not laughing anymore. In the years since then, Gabe has obliged me by growing a lot. He’s a couple inches past six feet now. His hair has darkened some over the years, but it’s still a shade of blond. The curls are gorgeous, too. I’d kill to have hair that beautiful. And his shoulders have filled out.
So, last night, at the wedding rehearsal when Mom saw him for the first time since sixth grade, she was surprised by how much he’d changed. She’s been telling me ever since how lucky I am to get to walk up the aisle with such an “attractive” (totally her word, not mine) young man. The job included the responsibility of being his partner during the second dance of the evening, too. And I admit the idea had a lot of appeal.
Until right between the wedding and the reception—which is when I started to feel not so hot. I didn’t want to say anything about it to my mom. I mean, what could she do? She was busy being the mother of the bride. And I wouldn’t want to ruin Kristen’s wedding, either.
I thought at first that I was just tired. It’d been a long morning and afternoon. So I just kept trying to muddle through. By the time dinner arrived at the table, my eyeballsfelt like they were on fire. I started wondering if I had a fever.
Gabe was sitting next to me. “You don’t look so great, Maddy,” he told me.
Gee…just what every girl wants some hot guy to say to her. He realized his mistake right away, and he started stuttering, “I mean—not that way, just, you know…like you don’t feel so good. You look great in that dress and all…y’know. I just meant you…are you sick?”
The sound of concern in his voice cheered me up a little but not much. “I don’t know,” I told him. “Let’s hope not.”
We were sitting on a dais at the head table—facing all the other wedding guests. He glanced out at the crowd of faces. “Yeah, let’s hope not,” he said. He dove into his food with an enthusiasm that made me feel even sicker. The sounds all around me were ringing in my head, too. All that cheering, and the frequent clinking of knives on champagne glasses… way too much for me.
“Ummm, I think I’d better get out of here,” I said to Gabe. “Will you tell Her Highness that I think I’m going to be sick? Otherwise, she’s sure to raise hell about my leaving right now.” Her Highness was Brenda Jackson, my sister’s college roommate, maid of honor, and Manager Extraordinaire. I’d been bossed around by her so much in the past few weeks that I was ready to kill her.
Gabe