The Dangerous Book for Demon Slayers Read Online Free PDF Page B

lounging around their mini-Weber
grills, playing cards and—oh my word—they'd duct-taped their
traveling dart board to a metal light pole.
    Had I really been inside that long?
    "Lizzie!" Grandma waved from her perch on the hood of a silver
BMW, her motorcycle boots planted on the front bumper.
    She directed her attention back to a blindfolded witch in pink leather
pants, currently aiming a dart at a parked highway patrol cruiser.
    "Go left! You got it," Grandma hollered. "Fire!"
    "Stop!" I called to the blonde witch, known as Crazy Frieda, who
was about to take out the fuzz. "Grandma's going to get you
arrested!"
    Frieda dug a pink fingernail around her blindfold. "Wouldn't be the
first time." She blinked her eyes twice, sunlight glittering off her
rhinestone-tipped lashes.
    "What is this? Las Vegas Bikefest?" I said to Grandma, who looked
entirely too amused. I'd bet anything they'd whipped up some kind of cover
spell to keep the party going.
    She stretched her arms over her head. "What can I say? Life is about
catching that magic moment."
    Ah, yes. The Van Halen life philosophy. Come to think of it, I didn't really
want to know if they'd voodooed the lot or not. "Where's Dimitri?"
    "You pass the test?" she countered, sliding off the car and
doubling back behind me. "Ah hah!" Grandma plucked the permit from my
back pocket and holding it up for everyone to see. "Call Oral
Roberts—it's a miracle! Lizzie passed!"
    I felt the pink rise to my cheeks.
    The Red Skulls let out a series of whoops and cheers. Frieda enveloped me in
a hug that smelled like Bengay and cigarettes.
    "Aw, now that's nice," Pirate said, wedged in the middle. Frieda's
bracelets dug into my raw left side and I pulled away.
    She chomped at her gum, beaming at me. "I'm proud of you,
sweetie," she said. "Now excuse me while I kick your grandmama's ass."
    "First things first," I said, raising my voice for the benefit of
the parking lot crowd. I was starting to worry. "Has anyone seen
Dimitri?"
    "Kiss him in Vegas," Grandma said to a cascade of whistles and at
least one catcall from some smart aleck in the back. She winked at her friends
and clapped me on my good shoulder. "Just don't do it in front of
me."
    A tickle of fear ran up my neck. "What do you mean Vegas?"
    He couldn't. He wouldn't.
    "Can your pumpkins," she said, accepting a charred hotdog from one
of the witches. "Dimitri decided to ride ahead."
    Sweet mother. And nobody stopped him? "You let a griffin go into Las
Vegas?"
    "Sure." She shrugged, taking a bite. "He's a big boy.
Besides, he was getting on my last nerve."
    Oh great. Grandma, my esteemed instructor, didn't know what a succubus could
do to a griffin. I was screwed two ways to Sunday. "Listen," I said,
trying to keep Pirate from jumping into her arms. "I talked to a
Department of Intramagical Welfare guy in there. He said the she-demons will
corrupt Dimitri, suck him dry."
    Grandma's eyes widened to saucers.
    Frieda gasped. "Maybe that's why he couldn't stand still while you were
in there. It was like he had termites in his pants. Couldn't stop looking down
the highway."
    This was bad. "He must have sensed them. There are at least thirteen
succubi."
    "At least?" Grandma scoffed. "Dammit, Lizzie. You'd better
count them and make sure."
    How did everyone know about that but me?
    I dialed Dimitri's cell number, but it went straight to voice mail.
    "Round up the Red Skulls," I said. "We're leaving."
Maybe we could overtake Dimitri before he reached the city.
    Yeah, and bats ride bicycles.
    "Not so fast," Grandma said. "We need to get your Uncle Phil
first. Dimitri can take care of himself."
    I knew Dimitri was good in a fight, but still… "He's up against
multiple demons."
    "Yeah, but he's not the target. Phil is. Besides, if anybody can avoid
a demon, it's a Red Skull. Ant Eater!" Grandma called over her shoulder,
eyeing me the whole time. A monster truck of a witch with curly gray hair and a
red leather halter jogged up. Her gold tooth