The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time Read Online Free PDF Page B

you to come and say hello."
    I didn't reply to this either because Mrs. Alexander was doing what is called chatting, where people say things to each other which aren't questions and answers and aren't connected.
    Then she said, "Even if it's only because you're doing detective work."
    And I said, "Thank you" again.
    And I was about to turn and walk away when she said, "I have a grandson your age."
    I tried to do chatting by saying, "My age is 15 years and 3 months and 3 days."
    And she said, "Well, almost your age."
    Then we said nothing for a little while until she said, "You don't have a dog, do you?"
    And I said, "No."
    She said, "You'd probably like a dog, wouldn't you."
    And I said, "I have a rat."
    And she said, "A rat?"
    And I said, "He's called Toby."
    And she said, "Oh."
    And I said, "Most people don't like rats because they think they carry diseases like bubonic plague. But that's only because they lived in sewers and stowed away on ships coming from foreign countries where there were strange diseases. But rats are very clean. Toby is always washing himself. And you don't have to take him out for walks. I just let him run around my room so that he gets some exercise. And sometimes he sits on my shoulder or hides in my sleeve like it's a burrow. But rats don't live in burrows in nature."
    Mrs. Alexander said, "Do you want to come in for tea?"
    And I said, "I don't go into other people's houses."
    And she said, "Well, maybe I could bring some out here. Do you like lemon squash?"
    I replied, "I only like orange squash."
    And she said, "Luckily I have some of that as well. And what about Battenberg?"
    And I said, "I don't know because I don't know what Battenberg is."
    She said, "It's a kind of cake. It has four pink and yellow squares in the middle and it has marzipan icing round the edge."
    And I said, "Is it a long cake with a square cross section which is divided into equally sized, alternately colored squares?"
    And she said, "Yes, I think you could probably describe it like that."
    I said, "I think I'd like the pink squares but not the yellow squares because I don't like yellow. And I don't know what marzipan is, so I don't know whether I'd like that."
    And she said, "I'm afraid marzipan is yellow, too. Perhaps I should bring out some biscuits instead. Do you like biscuits?"
    And I said, "Yes. Some sorts of biscuits."
    And she said, "I'll get a selection."
    Then she turned and went into the house. She moved very slowly because she was an old lady and she was inside the house for more than 6 minutes and I began to get nervous because I didn't know what she was doing in the house. I didn't know her well enough to know whether she was telling the truth about getting orange squash and Battenberg cake. And I thought she might be ringing the police and then I'd get into much more serious trouble because of the caution.
    So I walked away.
    And as I was crossing the street I had a stroke of inspiration about who might have killed Wellington. I was imagining a Chain of Reasoning inside my head which was like this
    1. Why would you kill a dog?
    a) Because you hated the dog.
    b) Because you were mad.
    c) Because you wanted to make Mrs. Shears upset.
    2.1 didn't know anyone who hated Wellington, so if it was (a) it was probably a stranger. 3.1 didn't know any mad people, so if it was (b) it was also probably a stranger.
    4. Most murders are committed by someone who is known to the victim. In fact, you are most likely to be murdered by a member of your own family on Christmas Day. This is a fact. Wellington was therefore most likely to have been killed by someone known to him.
    5. If it was (c) I only knew one person who didn't like Mrs. Shears, and that was Mr. Shears, who knew Wellington very well indeed.
    This meant that Mr. Shears was my Prime Suspect.
    Mr. Shears used to be married to Mrs. Shears and they lived together until two years ago. Then Mr. Shears left and didn't come back. This was why Mrs. Shears came over and