The Brotherhood of Rotten Babysitters Read Online Free PDF Page B

BLAMMO! They control the greatest power the world knows!”
    “The White House?” Exact Change Kid gasped. “No! Television! This is a battle for Prime Time! For TGI Fridays, Must-See Thursdays, and Whatever-They-Call-It Tuesdays!” Pete shouted. “Yes... the bell may have saved us all these years, but now we’re the ones who must save the bell!” He headed for the front door.
    “Pete! NO!” I shouted.
    Pete flung open the front door. He teetered forward on his feet. I raced toward him at 36 miles per hour and tackled him away from the door. We rolled on the floor, and Pete sprang to his feet.
    “Okay! Which one of you can fly again?” Pete asked.
    A look of terror crossed the Sidekicks’ faces. “Maaa pam!” Boy-in-the-Plastic-Bubble Boy shouted, and everyone ran for cover like cockroaches scampering away from a bright light.
    “What? You think I’d just throw one of you out the door to see if you can fly?” Pete huffed. “You! Lady! Can you fly?”
    “That’s my
mom
!” I reminded Pete.
    “And moms can’t fly?”
    “Not mine.”
    “Has she ever tried?”
    “No.”
    “No time better than the present!”
    Pete took a step toward my mother. She whipped out a spatula and smacked Pete across his pumpkin head. “Don’t even think about it, squash-head.”
    Pete grumbled and stomped toward the couch. Exact Change Kid scrambled out the other side on his hands and knees. “I can’t fly! I can’t fly!” he squealed repeatedly.
    Pete fumed.
    “I hate to ask, Pete, but why do you think everyone can fly but me?” I questioned.
    “Because I already know you’re only good for one thing. And trust me when I say that the day I think complaining can save the world, you’ll be the first person I call.” Pete scanned the room. “Now where’s that kid with the big ears? We can just climb on his back and glide to Earth.”
    “You’ve thrown Earlobe Lad off the Sidekick Super Clubhouse two times already! He couldn’t fly then and he still can’t fly now!” I explained.
    “Fly, no.
Glide,
maybe.”
    “He can’t fly or glide, Pete! He has super hearing!”
    “Oh, and you just
expect
me to believe a kid with giant ears has super hearing? That boy’s a glider, I tell you!” Pete fell to the floor and searched under the couch. “A kid with ears that big can’t hide forever!”
    As Pete scampered about on the floor, I finally realized something. “Hey,” I said as the thought hit me, “has
anyone
seen Earlobe Lad?”

Chapter Nine
    The Chapter That Tells You What Happened to Earlobe Lad, Even Though I Didn’t Know It at the Time!

    “Uh... hello?” Earlobe Lad whispered.
    He waved his arms to the left, then to the right. He rocked slowly back and forth, but couldn’t grab the closest branch that hung just inches from his reach. He twisted and turned, then stopped, realizing that if he fell from that height, it would certainly hurt.
    Maybe not his body, but his ears, anyway. There was sure to be a very loud
PLOP!
when he hit the ground.
    No, Earlobe Lad wasn’t hanging precariously from my roof, soaring thousands of feet above the ground. Nor was he hanging precariously from a window, soaring thousands of feet above the ground. In fact, Earlobe Lad was neither soaring nor thousands of feet above the ground. He was, however, hanging precariously.
    At least he had that going for him.
    See, as we would later find out, when we were flying toward certain doom, Earlobe Lad was hanging by his Spandexed butt from a tree that stood tall and strong in the parking lot of what was once the home to Donutz Village.
    Earlier that day, he had quietly strolled up to Donutz Village to get his daily Cinnabun. The shop was empty and had yet to open, so Earlobe Lad checked his Super Watch of Time-telling and Wristness once, then twice, but before he could check his watch a third time, something very interesting happened.
    Completely unknown to Earlobe Lad, at that very moment, across the street from the park, on