The Book of Death Read Online Free PDF Page B

of it.
    POLICE RECRUITING
TODAY
    ‘I’ll have my eggs sunny side up
today please,’ he said, hoping to change the subject.
    ‘Oh, okay,’ said Flake. ‘But
what do you think of the flyer?’
    ‘And I’d like my sausages
burned, please.’
    ‘Okay, no problem. So
what do you think of the…’
    ‘And an extra piece of bacon.’
    ‘Okay, anything else?’
    ‘That should do it.’
    Flake was very persistent, much
to Sanchez’s irritation. ‘See they’re allowing just about anyone to join the
police now,’ she said pointing at the flyer. ‘Just as a temporary measure,
until they can get some real cops in from out of town. So, you gonna sign up?’
    ‘Actually, did I mention I
wanted white toast?’
    ‘You always have white toast.’
    ‘Just making sure you hadn’t
forgotten.’
    Flake giggled. ‘You’re so
funny,’ she said, gazing at him with big hopeful brown eyes. ‘So are you going
to sign up or what?’
    Sanchez sighed. ‘I’d love to,’
he said. ‘But I’m not tall enough. I don’t meet the height restrictions.’
    ‘There are no height
restrictions,’ Flake said, her voice sounding more excited with every syllable.
    ‘I’m too old then.’
    ‘No age restrictions either.
Great, isn’t it?’
    ‘I have a criminal record.’
    ‘Doesn’t matter! Look, read the
whole flyer. They’re taking anyone. This is your big chance!’
    There was no doubt about it. She
had to be on drugs. No one should be that enthusiastic in the morning.
Particularly not when they were serving breakfast. Still, Sanchez decided to
play along for now. He was willing to tell Flake whatever she wanted to hear,
as long as it meant he got to eat his breakfast in peace.
    ‘Well, that’s great news isn’t
it?’ he said disingenuously. ‘I’ll be down there as soon as I’ve finished my
breakfast. Just try and stop me.’
    ‘Brilliant,’ said Flake,
clapping her hands together with glee. ‘We can go together. I’m signing up too.
I’m so glad I’ll have someone to go with. This will just be the most fun, won’t
it?’
    ‘What?’
    ‘I’ll drive us there as soon as
you’ve finished your breakfast.’
    ‘Huh?’
    ‘I’m so excited! My horoscope
said this would happen!’
    ‘Wait, hold on a—’
    ‘In fact, I’m going to buy your
breakfast for you this morning.’ With that, Flake dashed off back to the
kitchen to make his breakfast. She sure did seem excited. Sanchez figured he’d
let her pay for his breakfast, as it was obviously important to her. But then,
once he’d finished eating it, he’d come up with a way of getting out of signing
up for the police force.

 

 
    Five

 
    Dan Harker was having a hell of a day already. In the early hours of the
morning he had been summoned to the Mayor’s office and deputized as the new
Captain of the Santa Mondega Police Department. His first day wasn’t going to
be a gentle bedding-in, either. Most of the city cops had been murdered the
previous day so he wasn’t going to have much help dealing with any crimes. The
Mayor had done all he could to help by placing advertisements all over town
requesting members of the public to sign up, but that just meant Harker would
have to spend half the day recruiting.
    Investigating the most recent Bourbon Kid massacre and totaling up the number
of victims was going to be one hell of a job. The only good news was that
according to a number of eyewitnesses the Bourbon Kid had been gunned down and
beheaded in a hotel corridor just after midnight, so by rights the killing
should have come to an end.
    Before heading to the station to introduce himself as the new Captain,
Harker first had to stop off at the local museum. The mayor had informed him
that the security department at the museum had some CCTV footage of the Kid
murdering their manager, Professor Bertram Cromwell.
    When Harker arrived at the museum, Elijah Simmonds, the deputy manager,
greeted him in the reception area. Harker had only met Simmonds on one