The Adoration of Jenna Fox Read Online Free PDF

often she thinks
about that.
    Lily regularly glances my way to make sure I
haven't wandered away or started a conversation with anyone. Occasionally
someone passes through the courtyard, mostly other priests, but I remain quiet.
Lily told me to. "Your mother would want it that way," she says.
    I see a boy, taller than Father Rico, across
the courtyard. He approaches them. His hands are dirty, and he swipes away long
cords of black hair spilling in front of his eyes with his forearm. He is . . .
pleasant looking. I think that's the word. He talks to Father Rico, nods his
head, and then glances over at me. I see Lily's face. She has noticed and sits
up straighter like she is ready to spring. I think he is going to walk over to
me and I look away to discourage him. It works. He says a few more words to
Father Rico and goes back the way he came, and I am immediately angry with
myself for being so quick to please Lily and Mother. It won't happen again.
     
     
    Go
to Your Room
    Mother sips orange juice at the
counter, looking over a list of tasks for the day. Lily grates cheese over a
bowl of eggs. I sip my nutrients, which are tasteless. I swig down the last of
them in a quick gulp and ask, "Was I a history buff?"
    Mother barely looks up from her list. "A
what?"
    I decide to rephrase Mr. Bender's question.
"Did I like history? Was it my favorite subject?"
    Mother smiles and looks back at her list,
making a few changes. "Hardly," she answers. "I'm afraid history —and math for that matter—were tutorworthy for you." She is absorbed again in her
planning. Tutorworthy ? I must have had an excellent
tutor.
    I push my empty glass away and announce,
"I'm going to school today."
    Mother drops her pencil and stares at me. Lily
stops beating her eggs.
    "I assume I didn't graduate during the
year I was in a coma, so I still need to finish, right?"
    Mother hasn't spoken. Her mouth is open and her
head shakes slightly, like my words are ricocheting around inside. Somehow, I
find it amusing.
    "There's two village charters within
walking distance —I checked the directory on the
Net—and the Central Academy is just a short drive."
    "You can't drive!" The words shoot
out of Mother, and then she says more calmly, "School is out of the
question. You're still recovering —"
    "I'm fine —"
    Mother stands. "I said school is
out of the question. Period."
    I hesitate, but then stand, too. "And I
say it isn't."
    Mother is shocked into a marble stance. Neither
of us speaks. Finally she looks away. She sits back down. She picks up her
pencil. She is calm, smooth, practiced, the mother who seems to know where we
are going before I do. "Go to your room, Jenna. You need to rest. Go.
Now."
    I am seething. Outraged. Incensed. The
words. They're finally bubbling up in torrents just when I need them.
    But the will. It is waning. Mother says
I should go to my room. Go to your room, Jenna. Go to your room.
    I do.
    The rage is doubling, multiplying, filling my
vision like a black cloud. I can hardly see as each step brings me closer to my
room. Go to your room. Jenna. And I am. I am. I collapse on the last
stair and rock back and forth silently. What world have I woken up to? What
nightmare am I in? Why am I compelled to do as Mother says even when I have a
desperate need to do something else? I rock in the dark hollow of the landing,
feeling like I am back in the silent vacuum where my voice is never heard. If
Jenna Fox was a weak-willed coward, I don't want to be her at all. I hug my
arms, trying to squeeze away the world. I hear a sharp voice. It is Mother. She
is angry. At me? I did as she asked. I lean near the banister to listen. Lily's
voice is angry, too.
    "When will you admit you made a
mistake?"
    "Stop it! You of all people should
understand! If it weren't for in vitro, I wouldn't be here. You always called
me your miracle. Why can't I have one, too? Why do you get to decide when the
miracles will end?"
    "It's not natural."
    "Neither was I! You