Ten Things I Hate About Me Read Online Free PDF Page B

identities (I’ve clearly got some CRB—chat-room baggage—which I can e-mail you about some other time).
    OK, in a nutshell, here’s my intro. If you don’t like it, we can simply delete each other’s e-mails and move on, no hard feelings.
    Right. Here goes.
    My birthday is September 3rd and I like handbags and dangly earrings.
    My mom died of a heart attack when I was nine and, no, I don’t want to do a deep-and-meaningful about it.
    I live with the following:
Surround-sound electric blue stereo system
The DVD collection of The Godfather trilogy
A 2500 horsepower hair dryer and diffuser
My dad
A brother and sister:
    a) Shereen : Twenty-two years old. Majoring in politics
    at Sydney University.
    Used to have dreadlocks, now wears the hijab. She
    buys her T-shirts online to avoid manufacturers who
    use sweatshops—in other words, total weirdo.
    b) Bilal : He just turned eighteen. He bleaches his hair
    and wears baggy pants. Firmly believes he’s a chick
    magnet. Nearly gave my father a heart attack when he
    arrived home last week with freshly bleached spiky hair
    and a tattoo on his shoulder with all our names written
    inside the body of an anaconda.
    PS (as in Physical Stats): I have big brown eyes and long eyelashes that need Maybelline X-Factor mascara to curl. I’ve got a bit of acne but it’s not enough to warrant total high-school annihilation. I have curly hair that I often straighten into submission.
    That’s all for now.
    PS (as in postscript): Since we’re totally anonymous I might as well tell you that I’m Lebanese-Muslim. I attend madrasa (Arabic school) once a week and I’m part of an Arabic band.
    From: [email protected]
    To: [email protected]
    The first thing I would like to do is to congratulate you on your acquisition of The Godfather trilogy. It says a lot about a person’s character (particularly a girl’s) if they are a fan of the greatest trilogy on earth.
    So, well done.
    The second thing is that I like garlic on my kebabs; Petra in Jordan is on my Places to Travel list; and I know how to say “son of a donkey” and “move your car” in Arabic due to overhearing the constant arguing between my neighbors (two brothers).
    The third thing I would like to point out is that we will never discuss hair or mascara again.
    And please, I am begging you in the interests of human rights and world peace, would you kindly refrain from using chat-room vocabulary with me? Abbreviations, secret codes—I am sixteen years old and one month, not eleven.
    So can you tell me the Ten Things now?
    From: [email protected]
    To: [email protected]
    Ahem. Where are your VS??? (I abbreviate. Deal with it or use your cursor and send me off to deleted items.)
    From: [email protected]
    To: [email protected]
    Only child. Anglo background. Grew up on the North Shore. I love peanut M&M’S. I hate reality TV shows. I’ve been to Thailand and Darwin. I hate most sports (except table tennis) but have an unblemished record of masculinity and heterosexuality. I’m addicted to cheese-flavored rice crackers. I think seaweed-flavored rice crackers are just wrong.
    Is that enough?
    I’ll have to continue the e-mail exchange another time as Amy has just sent me five text messages in a row. She urgently needs help understanding an assignment we have due tomorrow on To Kill a Mockingbird. So I log off (it’s good to play hard to get with guys, even if it’s in cyber world) and spend the rest of the night on the phone with Amy discussing Boo Radley and Atticus Finch.

6
    I NOTICE AMY and Liz sitting outside a classroom. Liz has her arm slung over Amy’s shoulder and Amy’s head is down. I walk up to them and feel myself bump into an invisible wall. It knocks me straight in the face and I shrink back. There seems to be a hidden aura surrounding the two of them, repelling me, turning me away.