Tasting, Finding, Keeping: The Story of Never Read Online Free PDF Page B

teaches classes.”
    “That's cool,” Ty says, but I cut him off.
    “No, it's not. She could've made more money working at Mc-fucking-Donalds. I don't know how someone could be that selfish and still pretend they care, you know?” Ty laughs, and it sounds bitter and dry.
    “I know what you mean,” he says as we pause outside a 24-hour coffee shop. “Want something?” he asks me, and I nod as this strange feeling takes over me. I'm hanging out with a guy with butterfly tattoos who worked as a hooker and blew me off at our first meeting. The same guy who tackled a person with a gun just to save me and has a smile with dimples. I'm making a friend. I smile.
    “Coffee, black,” I say and Ty grins.
    “Funny,” he says. “That's just the way I like mine.”

5
    “I had one serious boyfriend in high school,” I tell Ty as we sit on the edge of a cliff and look down at the sea below. My coffee is clutched between my fingers, cold now but still good. Ty finishes his with one last sip and crushes the cup between his hands. “We dated right up until the day I ran away. I still think about him sometimes.”
    “What was his name?” Ty asks as he sets the cup down in the grass beside him and wraps his arms around his knees. I watch the horizon and see that it's already tinted with a rosy blush, preparing itself for the sunrise that's only moments away. I can hardly wait. After what happened to the two of us last night, we could use a little light.
    “Noah,” I say with a smile, thinking of one of the last times I saw him, waving goodbye to me from the parking lot near the high school. That was just days before junior prom. I wonder if he went with anyone else, or if he was still holding out for me. I guess I'll never know.
    “Just Noah?” Ty asks as he leans back and puts his hands in the grass. “No last name? What is he, like Madonna or something?”
    “Of course he has a last name,” I say as I finish my own coffee and go for another cigarette. I try to hand one to Ty, but he waves it away.
    “What was it then?” he asks, feeling awfully bold in this early morning darkness.
    “Scott.”
    “Noah Scott, the long lost love of Never Ross. Why don't you call him? Look him up online?”
    “I do way better than that,” I say as I copy Ty's pose and lean back. “I stalk him online.”
    “Ah,” Ty says as he reaches over and plucks the cigarette from my mouth. “You're one of those.” He puts it in his mouth and smirks at me. Apparently, we're good enough friends now that he can do this. I guess we both did tackle a bunch of armed thugs, so I let it go. I'm a little uncomfortable, but I don't say anything, just pull out another cigarette and light it.
    “He goes to school in the same town where we grew up, at the community college. I don't know why; he always had good grades. As far as I knew, he could've gone anywhere he wanted.” Ty doesn't say a word, just blows smoke into the cool air. “What about you?” I ask, and he turns his head slowly to look at me. “Any long lost loves?” Ty purses his lips, but I don't think the expression's for me. I'm pretty sure it's for his own thoughts. He doesn't look all that happy about what's going though his head.
    “Not a single one,” he says, and I can see that he's being honest. In fact, he looks kind of pissed off about it.
    “It's not as glamorous as it sounds,” I promise, feeling the rush of pain and loneliness that had swept over me as I'd driven out of town and never looked back. Suddenly, it gets hard for me to breathe, and I sit up, leaning over my legs like I'm trying to touch my bare toes. They're like blocks of ice, and they hurt like hell, but I'm not ready to go back to the dorms, not yet.
    “It's better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all, right?” I scoff at Ty's words.
    “So says the prick who's never been in love.” He stares at me, and I realize how badly that came out. “Not you,” I sputter and Ty smiles.
    “You